I Will Follow You Into the Dark
by AngelOfLorien
Summary: Sirius Black/OC, 1977-81. Life in the Order during the First War. A lot happens. It's hard to summarize, so maybe just give it a shot?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is a Marauder's story, but it mostly centered around Sirius (shock!) and an OFC. I know a lot of people get tetchy when characters don't like Peter because he was, after all, just another one of the quad, but if it makes you feel better, my OC doesn't really like James all that much either. lol **

**Still, I hope you give her a chance. :) **

**R&R! **

_December 30__th__, 1977  
Seventh Year _

Desdemona Keating brushed her wet hair and sighed. It looked like she was on her own tonight—_again_. She was happy for her best friend, Lily Evans, and her relationship with James Potter, but every now and then petty jealousy reared its ugly head. Desi tied the belt of her robe and turned to leave the girls shower room, gasping as she spied a fat little rat in the corner.

"Ugh! One more time, Peter, and I swear I'll report you to McGonagall," she said angrily. The rat darted for a nearby hole and disappeared.

Desi shook her head. Last year a few of her friends had secretly mastered the magic needed to become Animagi. She didn't know why unless it was just to prove to themselves that they could, but by doing it off-the-record they were breaking several wizarding laws.

And by _keeping_ it off-the-record, so were she and Lily.

She left the bathroom and crossed the Common Room, heading for the stairs to the girls dorm. She was about halfway across the room when she tripped over nothing—a nothing that made a surprised 'oof!' sound as Desi went sprawling.

She tossed her wet hair from her face and stared at the crimson carpet. The tip of a Converse basketball shoe was the only thing visible.

"What are you doing in the floor under an Invisibility Cloak?" Desi demanded.

There was a rustling sound and the untidy head of Sirius Black appeared. "I was looking for something," he said defensively, wincing in pain. "I think you've cracked my rib."

"If I did you deserve it for stretching out in the floor while _invisible!_"

"I wasn't planning on someone stomping across the room and running over me with their big feet, was I? What're you doing in anyway, Dizzy? I figured you'd be in the village enjoying the rest of the holiday."

"I don't have anything to do," Desi admitted, crossing her arms over her chest. It annoyed her when he called her Dizzy and he knew it, which was the reason he did it. "I didn't figure you'd be back this early yourself, what with your new place and all."

"The lads and I got back this afternoon. James was ready to get back to Lily. It's kinda boring 'round my place. Not much going on by way of entertainment."

"It's still new. Maybe after graduation, once you get it decorated..."

"I don't give a witch's teeth about decorations," Sirius said, lifting the corner of an ottoman. "It's got a roof and four walls. That's all I need."

"You've got the chance to make it a nice house. Lily says there's plenty of space," Desi said, crossing her legs.

"Yeah, well…" Sirius ran a hand through his messy hair and stared at her. She stared back. Finally, he spoke and whipped off the Invisibility Cloak, folding it and tossing it onto the back of the sofa. "Fine, if you're just gonna sit there you can help me look. I've lost a key."

Desi let out a laugh that held little amusement. "You're awfully presumptuous. What makes you think I want to help you find something? I've got a nice warm bed and a good book waiting for me upstairs," she lied. "And I'd sooner lay in a soft bed than roll around on the floor with you."

Sirius shrugged and turned away. "Suit yourself then."

"What's the key to?" Desi asked. She sighed and scanned the floor for any sign of it.

"One of the passages out of the castle. The one that goes to the wine cellar of the Three Broomsticks. I told James to keep it, but he said I was responsible enough for it, the git," Sirius said with a self-depreciating grin.

Desi shook her head, a small smile playing with her lips as she got onto her knees and crawled around the couch, helping Sirius search for his key.

"What are you doing?" Remus asked as he entered, tossing his book bag on a nearby chair.

The two looked up and Sirius sat up on his knees, pulling a hair tie from his pocket as he answered Remus.

"I dropped something," he said, pulling his hair back into the tie. Strands pulled loose almost immediately, but Sirius ignored them.

"You lost the key, didn't you?" Remus asked with a knowing smile.

"See there, Moony, you're always jumping to conclusions," Sirius said.

Remus tucked his tongue in his cheek and flicked a glance at Desi then back at Sirius. "Uh-huh… In most cases they just happen to be the _right_ conclusion," he said.

"What's going on?" James asked as he helped Lily through the door.

"They're looking for the key to the passage. Sirius lost it," Remus said.

"I didn't lose it," Sirius muttered. "It's just…temporarily misplaced."

"Our New Year's plans rest in the availability of that key, mate," James said.

"Hey, I told you not to give it to me, didn't I? You're the one who forced it on me, you prat."

James nudged Sirius's butt with his foot, sending his friend's head careening into the coffee table.

"Oi!"

James and Remus laughed as Lily and Desi shook their heads and rolled their eyes. _Boys…_

"So, assuming we find the key that Sirius _didn't _lose, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?" Desi asked as she looked under the sofa.

"Just sneaking out for a few bottles and other immoral things," Sirius replied.

"You should come," Remus said, sprawling in a chair. "Lily's coming."

"Oh, please come, Desi," Lily said. "If not, I'll be the only girl. And we haven't had much time to hang out lately."

"Now, now," Sirius said with mock authority. "We mustn't corrupt the innocent and well-behaved. Why, James has already dragged poor Lily down into the muck. Besides, I'm sure Miss Keating already has a nice novel picked out to read tomorrow night," he said, arching a brow in challenge.

"Actually," Desi said with a chilly smile, "I think it would be fun." She snatched the key from the corner of the sofa cushion and tossed it to Sirius. "Count me in."

* * *

Desi let out a howl as she stumbled along in the snow. She laughed as Remus wrapped his arm around her waist.

"Sshh!" he said, laughing. "You'll wake the whole castle."

"Dance with me, Remus," Desi said, taking his hands and lifting them above her head as she twitched her hips.

"She's knackered," Remus told Lily helplessly, smiling.

"And why shouldn't I be?" Desi asked dropping Remus's hands and turning to James and Lily. "It is the dawning of a new year, after all. Even the most well behaved people have to let loose now and then."

She did a cartwheel, but the copious amount of Fire Whiskey coupled with the slick snow had her plummeting face first into a snow bank. She laughed the delighted laugh of someone who was way beyond sobriety.

"Desi, we're almost to the passage. C'mon and we'll get to bed," James said, his voice only slightly slurred.

"I'm rather comfy here," Desi said, throwing a snowball at Lily.

Remus went to her and took her hand, hauling her up and hooking one arm around his neck. He jerked his head at Sirius, who was trudging along behind them, still taking pulls from a bottle.

"Take this side," Remus said.

Sirius tossed his hair out of his face and tucked his bottle into his pocket. He followed Remus's actions of hooking Desi's other arm over his neck.

"Your girlfriend needs to learn to hold her drink," Sirius muttered as they half-dragged Desi to the entrance of the passage.

"She's not my girlfriend," Remus muttered, struggling for his wand. "She just actually likes me because I don't pester her."

He looked around for Lily and James, who had fallen behind and were making out again.

"Oi, take care of the tracks, will you?" he called.

James lifted a hand in acknowledgement, never breaking the kiss.

Remus and Sirius continued into the passage at a slow pace, as Remus had to manage his illuminated wand _and_ Desi.

"Here, give her over," Sirius said, stopping. He picked the drunken girl up and slung her over his shoulder, securing his arm over the backs of her knees.

Desi groaned. "Oh, I don't think I like this. How do you boys drink so much?"

Sirius ignored her as she pelted him with a thousand questions.

"I'm not a very good damsel in a dress, am I?" Desi slurred.

"You're not in a dress," Sirius pointed out.

"I think she means a damsel in distress," Remus said absently, patting his jacket. "Damn. James has my cigarettes. I wanted to have one before I went back in for the night. I'll be back in a minute. Go on ahead," he instructed, handing Sirius his wand.

Sirius rolled his eyes and hiked Desi up more onto his shoulder. "No, Dizzy, you aren't a very good damsel in distress. You don't need to be a damsel in distress, anyway. They're nothing but a bother."

"All your girlfriends are damsels in distresses," Desi pointed out.

"And you see how long I keep them around, don't you?" Sirius snapped. "The door's just ahead."

He tried to ignore the soft hip pressed against his cheek and the feel of her considerable breasts crushing against his back with every step he took…

He _tried_ to ignore these things, but failed miserably. He was a man, dammit. Control was not his biggest strength.

Desi groaned again and started struggling. Sirius tightened his hold on the backs of her knees and grabbed at her legs as she started to slide.

"Be still, Desi!" he said, dropping Remus's wand.

"Lemme down! I'mona be sick!"

Sirius dropped her where he stood. She hit the ground hard and he winced, kneeling beside her.

"Sorry," he said, rubbing her shoulder.

She struck out and hit him in the chest, but Sirius had a sneaking suspicion that she had been aiming for his face.

"You alright?" he asked. He reached into his back pocket and took out his wand, quietly whispering "_Lumos_."

In the soft blue glow from his wand, Desi looked terrible. Her face was flushed and she was breathing hard. Thanks to him and his oh-so-sensitive anti-vomit reflexes, the front of her clothes were covered in dirt. She sat with her back against the wall and her legs drawn close to her, resting her forehead on her knees.

Sirius picked up Remus's wand and tucked it into his pocket before moving to sit beside her.

"You all right?" he asked again.

He smiled when she turned her head and glared at him with a "go-to-hell-this-is-all-your-fault" look. He lifted a lock of hair from her eyes and tucked it behind her ear.

"No, huh?"

She moaned and buried her face against her knees once more. "It's hot in here," she mumbled against her legs. Her breath quickened and she leaned back, then forward, trying to ease the roiling in her stomach. Finally, she got onto her knees and turned away from Sirius. Her body was wracked with heaves as the alcohol rebelled against her. Sirius, slightly inebriated himself, patted her awkwardly, having never been in this situation and therefore unsure of how to proceed. He hooked his fingers in her silky hair and held it back as she emptied her stomach. When at last she was empty (how could one girl hold that much, anyway?) she sat back and leaned her cheek against the cool stone wall.

"Attractive, yeah?" she asked, not bothering to open her eyes.

"I've got to admit, I am slightly horrified," Sirius said, nodding.

She smiled weakly and he handed her some gum. She shook her head, but he insisted.

"It'll clean your mouth like you were never sick. And most importantly, it'll fend off a hangover. My own formula," he said, reassuring her.

She took it and popped it into her mouth. She was pale, but seemed to be over nausea for the moment.

Sirius stood and held his hand down to her. "C'mon. I'll get you to bed," he said as he took a small gold key from his pocket.

"I bet you say that to all the girls," Desi said with a small smile as she allowed him to haul her up.

"Most of 'em, yeah," Sirius agreed, flashing a first-rate grin as he steadied her.

He managed to maneuver her through the corridors without getting caught, but the Fat Lady, who had a grudge against Sirius because he once made the comment that her singing voice sounded like she had her hand caught in a door, rushed through the portraits to Professor McGonagall's room and raised the alarm that the two of them were out of their houses past curfew.

As Sirius balanced Desi against the wall and prepared to whisper the password, the soft shuffle of McGonagall's footsteps reached them.

Sirius did the only thing he could think of that would spare them a long explanation; he shoved Desi between a gargoyle statue and the entrance to Gryffindor tower. She opened her mouth to question him, but he seized the opportunity to crush his mouth to hers.

Desi didn't have any other option but to accept his kiss. Sirius angled his head so that he could have better access to her mouth, and he had just hitched his hand beneath one of her knees and hiked her leg over his hip when they were bathed in light and the stern voice of Professor McGonagall interrupted his ministrations.

"Mr. Black!" McGonagall barked.

Sirius pulled back from Desi and winked, silently telling her that he would take care of things.

"Yes, professor?"

"Are you aware, Mr. Black, that it is nearly _five hours_ past curfew? Kindly remember, Sirius, that this is an institution of education, _not_ fornication."

Desi's cheeks heated at hearing the word 'fornication' leave McGonagall's lips. Sirius, too, seemed embarrassed. He apologized and took Desi's arm, ushering her through the door McGonagall had just opened.

"Detention, both of you," McGonagall said firmly. "You're lucky I don't take you to the headmaster at once. To your rooms, now," she said. Once the students were up the stairs and in their own dorms, she returned to her room.

* * *

Desi left Gryffindor tower and made her way slowly to breakfast. Sirius's gum had worked and she didn't have a hangover, but she was sore from falling so much on the way back to the castle.

There were cackles and snickering in the hall as she rounded the corner and saw that James and Sirius were tormenting Severus Snape…again. James was a bully to Severus, but Sirius was the one who really detested the other boy, and vice versa. Maybe it had to do with the pure lineage blood-traitor issue, but their dislike ran much deeper than the usual schoolyard stuff.

"Why don't you stop being such a dick, Potter?" Desi demanded, giving James's shoulder a hard shove when he made Severus drop his books.

"Why, Dizzy," Sirius said with fake astonishment. "Such language!"

"Bugger off," Desi said, bending to pick up Severus's books. Bored by the interruption, James started toward the dining hall. Sirius followed at a much slower pace.

Desi gasped as the book she was holding was snatched from her hands.

"_Do not_ touch my things, Muggleborn," Severus said, his black eyes burning with hatred.

"Fine," Desi said with a frown, holding up her hands. "Sorry."

The boy stormed away in a flurry of black robes.

"You're welcome!" she called out sarcastically, shaking her head. High school sucked.

"I don't know why you feel the need to play heroine all the time," Sirius said as she rounded the corner.

Desi sighed and walked on. "I don't see why you feel the need to torture Severus," she countered. "He's already alienated himself from the entire school. I don't see what good it does to humiliate him whenever you get a chance."

Sirius tossed his head and shrugged. "What's it to you, Dizzy? It isn't like he's such a nice guy."

"No, he's not," Desi said, shoving the door to the dining hall open. "But I think there's a lot of other ways you can expel energy than picking on the most awkward student here."

"You sittin' with us or what?" Sirius asked as he plopped next to James.

Desi sighed and sat in the empty seat beside Sirius. "I just think you should lay off a bit," she said, continuing their conversation.

"What's it?" James asked.

"Dizzy's in love with Snivelus," Sirius said with a grin. "She thinks we're too mean on the poor boy."

Desi noticed the sadness that came into Lily's eyes at the mention of her former friend. She frowned at Sirius. "Be asses if you want. I'm just pointing out that we won't be at Hogwarts forever, so eventually you're going to have to learn to get along with people outside of your little club."

James started to speak, but stopped when Professor McGonagall approached the table. McGonagall passed Sirius and Desi a detention summons and walked on without a word.

Sirius groaned as he read the summons. "Great. We've got to do the tower every night for two weeks."

"Doesn't make much sense, if you ask me," Desi said, reading her own copy. "Giving us the same room to work in, considering we got detention in the first place because—" she stopped and looked up, feeling her cheeks flush.

"Because?" James prodded. He looked at Sirius suspiciously. "What's the detention for, then?"

"It's for me being a great mate, that's what it's for," Sirius said. "I sacrificed two weeks' worth of free time so you, Lily, and Remus wouldn't get caught last night. Head Boy and Girl, indeed. And with Remus being a prefect, I'm sure he's grateful."

Remus lifted his cup in a salute to Sirius. Lily eyed Desi with a knowing look. Her lips curved and Desi pointed a finger at her.

"Don't look at me like that, Evans," Desi said. She took a drink of her juice to cover her own smile.

* * *

The walk to first class was a dull one for Desi. It was the only class of the day that she had without any of her friends. She knew a few kids in the class, but she'd never really gotten past the acquaintance stage, so she sat in the back and paid attention as best she could.

Unfortunately, her attention kept straying from Professor Binns to Sirius Black, and before she knew it the other students began filing out of the classroom.

Desi gathered her books into her satchel and shuffled to the front of the room. She grunted as a student slammed into her when she started out the door.

"Oh, sorry," Desi said, bending to pick up her book bag.

"Why don't you watch where you're going?"

Desi straightened and eyed the raven-haired Slytherin standing in front of her. He was just as handsome as his brother, but where Sirius's eyes usually held a mischievous glint, Regulus's eyes were cold and hard.

"I was walking, Regulus. You're the one who ran into me."

Regulus Black was her junior by one year. When Desi had taken to tutoring younger students in her fourth year, her Charms teacher had recommended Regulus as one of her pupils. He was very powerful, but his interest resided mostly in the darker side of wizardry. He had remained her charge throughout his third and fourth year and had even, on occasion, laughed with her. However, at the beginning of his fifth year he stopped accepting her tutelage, the prejudice of blood status finally winning out, and for the last year he had skulked around with unsavory Slytherins.

"I saw you last night," Regulus sneered, pulling Desi back to the present. "Out after curfew. I saw the lot of you. I have half a mind to report you all."

"No need. I already have detention for it," Desi said. "Your brother does too."

"Brother?" Regulus hissed. "Sirius is a filthy blood-traitor. He should suffer for that disgrace."

"And you think telling on him for skipping out after curfew is going to accomplish that?" Desi asked dryly.

"He will get what is due him," Regulus said, his black eyes shining. "You all will," he added, almost to himself.

Before Desi could ask him what he meant, someone called her name.

"Miss Keating?"

She looked around and saw that the new class was seated and Professor Binns was waiting on Regulus to enter. She stepped aside and the angry young man swept past her. She left the room and sat on a bench in an alcove in the hallway, thinking back to when she and Regulus had almost been friends.

_"__How are you today, Reggie?"_

_He looked up at her, his black eyes cool and indifferent. "Don't call me that."_

_"__Fine," Desi said, sitting across from him in the library. "How are you today, Regulus?"_

_"__Don't you ever get tired of pretending to be nice to me?" he asked. "Why can't you ever just come in, tell me what page to turn to, and get on with our work?"_

_"__Because I like you," Desi said with a shrug. "I'm not particularly sure why, but I do. You're a smart kid and you've got a lot of potential."_

_"__Save your Muggleborn sentimentality for someone who gives a damn," he said._

_Desi rolled her eyes. "Would you relax? Besides, if you really didn't like me, you'd request a different tutor." She winked at him and pulled out her Charms book. "So…Christmas is coming up."_

_"__Bah humbug."_

_She blinked. "Was…was that a joke? And a Muggle lit reference?" She placed a hand over her heart and feigned a heart attack, falling over onto her books and ending in a death twitch._

_Regulus laughed and she sat up with a smile. They looked at each other for a minute, both grinning. Then another Slytherin student caught Regulus's eye and the smile slipped from his lips. He cleared his throat and his expression settled back into one of apathy. She saw the humour in his eyes fade and the usual coolness creep back in. Desi had no doubt that if given a chance, Regulus would be just as enjoyable as his older brother, and probably without being so obnoxious._

_"__Are you going home for holidays?" she asked._

_"__Yes. I have family obligations." He picked at the pristine cover of his textbook. "Perhaps we should get to work?"_

_Desi nodded. "Sure," she said softly._

He made her sad. Perhaps it was because he was so opposite Sirius—even though he was arrogant, the older Black did his best to stay friendly and lighthearted, whereas Regulus was hostile and grave. There was a sadness to him that he tried hard to cover.

"What's up, Dizzy?" Peter asked, stepping up beside Desi and pulling her from her thoughts.

Desi's lip curled of its own volition. She stood up and walked toward class. She really disliked Peter Pettigrew, but he had Advanced Potions too, so she had no choice but to walk with him.

"Don't call me that," she said.

"Sirius calls you that," Peter said grudgingly.

Desi wanted to point out that there was a world of difference between him and Sirius, but thought that might be too rude. After all, Peter was one of Sirius, Remus, and James's friends. Although come to think of it, she didn't really like James all that much either. Sirius was ok most of the time. Really, Remus was the only one consistently decent. However, her dislike of Peter was…deeper, as if something deep inside her was completely incapable of liking the boy.

"So what was ol' Reggie wanting?" Peter squeaked.

"Nothing," Desi said, peering out the windows. "Look, I'm not going to Potions today," she said suddenly. "Cover for me, will ya?"

Leaving Peter staring after her, she crossed the courtyard and sat on a wall.

"What are you doing here?"

Desi spun to see Sirius Black leaning against the corner or the building, hidden from sight should any teachers be patrolling for truant students.

"I…I don't really know," Desi said. "I just didn't want to go to Potions."

He picked at his fingertips and watched her for a moment, then ran a hand through his wavy hair.

"So…"

"So…" Desi repeated.

Sirius chuckled. "One night out with the bad kids and you go mad. Skiving off classes? For shame!"

Desi's lips curled in a soft smile at his teasing. "You aren't one of the bad kids," she said. "You're an ass, sure, but not bad."

A strange expression crossed Sirius's face, but it was quickly replaced by a cocky smirk. "So whatchoo wanna do for the next hour?"

Desi scoffed. "Just because we're skipping together doesn't necessarily mean we're skipping _together_, Black."

Sirius scrubbed a hand through hair again and stepped away from the wall, sauntering toward Desi with his smirk still in place. "Come now, Dizzy. You know you like spending time with me."

Desi narrowed her eyes and stood. "If you believe that, you're even more conceited than I thought. Which is really saying something, 'cause I pegged you as the most arrogant guy in our year."

Sirius scoffed. "James is far more arrogant than I am," he said dismissively.

Desi rolled her eyes and picked up her knapsack. "I've got homework I could be doing. Later, Sirius," she said.

"Wait, wait, wait," Sirius said, laughing. He caught her hand and stopped her from walking away, smiling broadly. "I'm sorry. Look, truce, all right? Least 'til after detention?"

Desi pulled her hand away and eyed him for a long moment. She sighed as she smiled. His grin was contagious.

"Ok," she said. "Truce."

"Temporarily," Sirius said with a wink.

* * *

Lily tossed her books on her bed and plopped down on the edge of Desi's, leaning forward with interest. "So you skived off Potions to be with Sirius?"

Desi rolled her eyes and turned down her record player. "What?"

"What the devil are you listening to?" Lily asked with a laugh.

"They're called ABBA. How long has it been since you've listened to a Muggle band?" she asked. "Now, what's this about me and Sirius?"

"Peter's been going on about you skipping out on Potions to be with Sirius. He says he saw you heading toward him when you left him in the corridor."

"That little snitch," Desi muttered.

"So you did!"

"No," Desi said. "Well, I mean, yeah. But it wasn't intentional. I just didn't want to go to class and he happened to be in the courtyard."

Her friend eyed her doubtfully. "So there's nothing going on between the two of you?"

"Absolutely not," Desi said.

"So why'd you get detention?" Lily asked. When Desi blushed, she smiled triumphantly.

Desi threw a pillow at her. "We were covering for you, Remus, and James," she said with a laugh.

"According to the Fat Lady, the two of you were glued together in a most compromising way."

Desi's mouth fell open. "What?! Compromising, indeed," she huffed. "He kissed me. That's it. I can't believe—" She cut her eyes at Lily when she smiled again. "Ugh, Evans, you liar. The Fat Lady didn't say anything, did she?"

Lily shook her head. "Of course not. But, dearest Desi, you have a very bad habit of letting the truth fly when you are flustered."

"Oh, shut up," Desi said with a little laugh.

"Damn," Lily said with a huff as she pulled a bit of parchment from her bag. "I forgot to give this to James. It's from Remus."

"Well where is he?"

"Out on the Quidditch field," Lily said. "Want to walk with me?"

Desi checked the clock. "Sure. I should have time to get there and back before detention starts."

"I'm sure. It's raining, so I doubt practice will last long," Lily said. "Sirius'll be on the pitch as well."

"Yes, well, it isn't as if Sirius will be as concerned about actually serving his detention. I, on the other hand, am."

"Well come on, then," Lily said, slinging on a rain robe. "Aren't you going to wear yours?" she asked Desi.

"Nah," Desi said. "It can't be raining that hard, can it?" she said, throwing a scarf around her neck.

As they stepped out of the main hall, they were met with a light mist. By the time they got to the Quidditch pitch, the cold winter rain was falling in sheets.

"What're you two doing out here?" Coach Firefit asked, holding up his wand and using an umbrellin charm to get Lily and Desi out of the rain.

"Sorry, coach," Lily said. "I had a message for Potter."

"Oh, well he's in the field. You want I should give it to him?"

"I'll just wait in the stands, if it's all the same," Lily said.

"Suit yourself," the coach said.

"I've got to get back," Desi shouted over the rain and the practice game.

"Ok," Lily replied. "Make sure you get out of your wet robes as soon as you get in so's you don't catch cold."

Desi nodded and tucked her hands into the sleeves of her jumper as she trudged through the slushy snow back to the castle. By the time she reached the Gryffindor common room, there wasn't a dry spot on her body.

She sneezed as she stepped through the portrait hole.

"Oh hey, there you—" Sirius stopped mid-sentence as he took in Desi's sopping robes. "Wha's the matter with you?" he demanded, striding forward and pulling her toward the hearth. "You're bleedin' mad. You're gonna catch your death."

Desi rolled her eyes. "I walked Lily out to the pitch to give James a message from Remus. What're you doing here?"

"I've got detention, don't I?" Sirius said. He peeled the wet scarf from Desi's neck and unfastened her robes, letting them drop with a squish.

"Do you mind?" Desi said, batting his hands away. Sirius put his hands on his hips. "So you skipped practice to serve detention?" she asked.

"No," Sirius said. "I went to practice. I just left early. Go and get changed so we're not late. I doubt McGonagall would be forgiving about that."

"I'm fine," Desi said. "My jumper will dry in a little bit. Let's go."

"You need to change. We're going to be in the tower. It's drafty up there."

Desi laughed. "You're acting like a mother hen," she said. "I'll be fine, Sirius. Let's—awg!" She let out a squawk as Sirius reached out and pulled her jumper over her head in one swift motion. Desi crossed her arms over her chest and opened her mouth to yell at him, but all she could manage was a strangled cough. She reached for her shirt but Sirius deftly shifted it out of her reach.

"Go and change clothes, Desi," he said patiently.

"There are rules about stripping off a woman's clothes without permission, Black!" Desi said savagely.

"Not when the woman's being an idiot and risking pneumonia. I'm practically a hero," he said. "Now, go and change. I'll go ahead to the tower and tell McGonagall that you're on your way."

Sirius ignored the furious snarl from behind him as he ducked out of the portrait hole. He heard a loud thump as the door shut behind him—he had narrowly missed getting clouted with a textbook.

Sirius smiled and tucked his hands in his pockets, whistling a merry tune. He had a feeling the next two weeks were going to be quite fun.

* * *

"Ugh," Sirius grunted as he traipsed up the stairs. "Words can't express how bloody glad I am that this is our last detention."

"It hasn't been that bad, in my opinion," Desi said, pausing in the stairwell and catching her breath. "Of course, that was when we were working in the Astronomy tower. Leave it to Filch to get McGonagall to make us clean the owlery on our last night."

The duo swept and brushed the floors, fed and watered the owls, and tended to the roosts. Sirius petted a few of the birds, murmuring softly to them as he stroked their heads.

"What's with that one?" Desi asked, nodding toward an old yellow barn owl. "He's been eyeing you since we got here."

"That's Icarus," Sirius said. "He's a bummer."

"A bummer?"

"He's nobody's owl. Just hangs around and roosts," Sirius explained. "He also hates me," he added with a grin.

"You spend a lot of time up here?"

"When I can," he said, nodding. "Surprised?"

"Honestly? Yes," Desi said.

"I'm going to choose not to take offense at that," Sirius said with a wink.

Desi stopped mopping her side of the floor long enough to look out the tower widow. She leaned against the stone and stared across the lake. The snow on the mountains glowed in the light of the moon and the inky water reflected the clear winter sky.

"Nice, yeah?"

Desi jumped as Sirius spoke beside her. She looked at him and nodded mutely. A wolf howled somewhere in the night, drawing Desi's attention back outside.

"To see it, one would think that everything's right in the world," Sirius said, his voice taking on a dreamy quality that Desi had never heard before. His blue eyes reflected the moon as he focused them on the stars overhead.

"You can almost forget about everything. NEWTS, the war…everything."

"Do you ever envy them, Sirius?" Desi asked.

He turned those haunting blue eyes on her and cocked his head to the side. "Who?"

She was careful not to look at him. "Muggles. Do you ever wish…" She let the question trail off.

"Sometimes," Sirius admitted. "They go through their lives completely unaware of the danger that lurks just beyond the shadows. There's no such thing as dark wizards and Death Eaters and blood status. There's just girls and school."

"Is that all?" Desi teased.

Sirius smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "What about you?" he asked. "Do you ever wish you'd stayed out of the wizarding world?"

"Now and again I do," Desi said, looking at him. She tossed her head as the breeze caught her hair and blew a few strands across her face. "But then I think about all I've experienced and how wonderful the wizarding world is. I'm a better person for being a part of it, ya know?"

Sirius nodded and ran a hand through his hair.

"Do you ever think it'll be over?" Desi asked, leaning on her elbows against the windowsill. "Do you think the world'll ever be happy?"

"One day, maybe," Sirius said, leaning beside her. He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, shrugging when she looked at him. "As for happy…well, I guess you've got to take that where you can. Even with everything that's going on, people are still getting together. Life is still going on. They're still making their happily ever afters. It's just that sometimes 'ever' is shorter than they first imagined."

They stared at each other in silence for a while as the wind blew gently around them. Some owls fluttered in their roosts, disturbed by the chill. Sirius straightened and faced her as she leaned her mop against the wall.

"I'm going to kiss you, Sirius Black," she said, raising her chin.

Sirius smiled at her defiant posture. Was she expecting an argument?

She stepped closer to him and brushed a wayward lock of hair from his brow. She cupped the back of his neck in her hand and pulled him down until his mouth was a hair's breadth from hers.

Desi inhaled slowly, waiting to see if he was going to commandeer the kiss. Sirius remained still as stone, however, and the corner or Desi's lips curved as she closed the distance between their mouths.

They got lost in the textures and tastes of each other. He ushered her away from the window, turning her and walking her backward until her back was against the wall. He placed his hands on either side of her head, boxing her in.

Unfortunately, his left hand rested near Icarus's roost. The ornery owl nipped Sirius's hand with his beak. Sirius swore and jerked away, surprised by the attack. He muttered a few unflattering things about Icarus before giving Desi an apologetic grin.

"Sorry," he said. "I tol' you he hates me. Bloody evil bird."

Desi laughed. "It's ok. He probably saved us from more detention."

Sirius nodded. "Alright look, Dizzy. I like you. You like me. Let's just do this thing, eh?"

"Excuse me?" Desi asked. "Do what thing?"

"You know. Go out."

She laughed. "Are you always this eloquent when you ask out girls?"

"Usually I'm really good at it. Seductive and the like. But since that ruddy bird's buggered up my suave approach—" Desi laughed again. "—I had to just go at it straightforward," Sirius finished with a crooked smile.

Desi thought about it for a moment. She and Sirius Black…dating?

"I'll go out with you, Sirius," Desi said. "On one condition."

"Oh, here we go," he muttered.

"I'll go out with you, but only if you let me help you decorate your house."

Sirius grimaced and looked as if he was weighing his options. "Alright," he said reluctantly. "Deal."


	2. Chapter 2

_**June 7, 1978**_

"It's mad to think it's over," Remus said, looping his arm across Lily and Desi's shoulders as they stood waiting for the carriages that would take them away from Hogwarts.

"Yeah, but it'll be nice to actually be able to get out there and do something useful. For the cause," James said.

"Voldemort's growing in power every day," Sirius said, lighting a cigarette and shrugging out of his graduation robes. "We can join the underground and fight."

"You both are so gung-ho about fighting," Peter said. "What could we do standing against Voldemort and his Death Eaters? We'd be killed inside of a minute."

"At least our deaths would count for something," Desi said. "It's time to face the future. I'm ready to see Voldemort fall."

"You're staying?" Remus asked. "I thought you've been planning on going back home to see your family."

"My real family's here," Desi said. "I love my parents, but it wouldn't make much sense to go back to them and just stand by while Voldemort destroys what I hold dear."

"So we're all together then?" Lily asked, wrapping an arm around James and Remus's waists.

"Together," James said, sticking his wand into the middle of the circle.

"Together," the others repeated, touching the tips of their wands and grinning as multicolored flames shot from the center.

"I've got a cousin in London who fights for the underground," Sirius said. "He can get us in there, for sure. They've got a headquarters and everything."

"Rumors have also been flying around Hogsmeade that there's another group in London," James said. "They're the best chance at taking down Voldemort that the wizarding world has. Call themselves the Order…what was it, Padfoot?"

"The Order of the Phoenix, according to the whispers at the Three Broomsticks."

"There is such a group," said a voice behind them. The teenagers whirled around, wands at the ready.

"Professor Dumbledore?" Lily said, lowering her wand.

"Indeed, Miss Evans." Dumbledore said with a soft smile. He looked at James and the others. "Such a group exists, but these are dangerous topics you are discussing," he said. "They are not to be taken lightly."

"We aren't taking any of it lightly," Remus said. "Professor, you've helped me more in the time I've been here than I can ever hope to repay," he said, looking at people surrounding him. Desi had only recently discovered his secret but had stood by him nonetheless. "We are very serious about this. If you know anything about where the organization meets—"

"We have to try—"

"—our right as wizards—"

Dumbledore held up his hand, sending his silvery white robes flourishing. "And you are all so resolved?"

Each person nodded as Dumbledore's gaze landed on them.

"Very well, then," he said. "Go tonight and enjoy yourselves. You only pass your NEWTS once," he added with a wink. "In the morning, go to The Leaky Cauldron. Someone will meet you there."

Dumbledore looked long and hard at the rabble of wizards and witches before him. He knew their potential. It was possible that the defeat of Voldemort lay within the hearts of these youth.

"Be certain," he said. When they looked at him, he continued. "The underground is very actively fighting against Voldemort. You must be absolutely certain about your decision to proceed on this path. Let no one sway your decisions. It must be your own."

"What about the Order of the Phoenix?" James asked.

"From the whispers I've heard, Mr. Potter, one must be invited. The underground and the Order are closely related, but the Order of the Phoenix is a very secret society. Only the most trustworthy of wizards will be admitted," he said. "Or, so I've heard."

The teenagers picked up their luggage as the carriages approached.

"Thank you, Professor," Desi said.

Dumbledore bowed his head slightly. "Until we meet again, Miss Keating."

Desi smiled and took the hand that Sirius held down to her, stepping up into the carriage. She took her seat between Sirius and Remus, keeping her eyes fixed on Hogwarts castle until it was swallowed by landscape.

They stepped off the train at platform 9 ¾ for the last time, each looking at the others with expressions made of pride, sadness, and a good deal of uncertainty.

"I'm going to Diagon Alley first off!" Peter exclaimed, bouncing joyfully as he prepared to Disapparate. "You fellas gonna dump the birds and meet me there?"

"Do you want to come?" James asked Lily and Desi.

Desi shook her head. "I think I'm gonna walk. Go on, Lil, if you want."

"I'll stay with you," Lily said. "We're going to take in the sights of London," she told James, placing a light kiss on his lips. "Take care of each other," she said, tugging on Sirius's jacket.

"I'm gonna have to take a rain check on Diagon Alley, mate," Sirius said, watching Lily and Desi walk away. He grinned as Peter groaned.

"You might as well be married," Peter whined. "You never go anywhere anymore."

James looked at Sirius and nodded. "Recon it'll come to that?" he asked with a laugh.

Sirius shrugged. "Who knows?"

"Come on, then," Remus said, shoving Sirius forward. "We'll see you later," he said, nodding to James.

"Sorry, mate," James said, smiling apologetically at Peter. "Oy!" he called, chasing after Remus and Sirius.

Peter looked around, uncertain of what to do. He swore and tucked his wand away, pushing through the throng of people to follow after James.

The London streets were teeming with people when the group left King's Cross Station.

"Whatchoo wanna do?" Desi asked Lily, smiling as Sirius caught her hand and laced his fingers with hers. "Well, hello."

"Hey yourself," Sirius said, tossing his hair out of his eyes.

"You didn't really think we'd let you loose on the city alone, did you?" James asked, wrapping his arm around Lily's shoulders. He smiled down at Peter as the other boy finally caught up. "Nice of you to join us, Wormtail."

"Wouldn't miss it," Peter wheezed.

"So what's the plan?" Remus asked, cupping his hands over his cigarette and lighting it. He shook back his shaggy hair and breathed in the smell of the city.

"Let's go dancing," Lily suggested.

All four boys groaned.

"Well I don't hear you making any suggestions," she said with a laugh, nudging James with her shoulder.

"Lil, we've never danced with Muggles," Peter said.

"Desi and I can show you," Lily said, grinning. "We used to dance all the time at school."

Desi laughed. "I reckon it isn't any different dancing at a Muggle club than it is dancing at a Wizard one."

"Let's go," Lily said, planting her hands on James's shoulder and rolling up on her toes. She giggled as James continued walking, dragging her along behind.

"I'm for it if you fellas are," Sirius said. He let go of Desi's hand and scooped an arm around Lily's waist, picking her up.

"Alright," Remus said, looking at Desi. "Where to?"

"There's a club on Bond Street. I've never been, but my brother swears it's top notch. He's in and out of London often, you know."

"You've told me that," Lily said, nodding. She struggled against Sirius's grasp, laughing as he held her off the ground. "Maybe we'll see him."

"Maybe," Desi said with a shrug. "It's been months since I've seen him. He…well, he's a little uncomfortable with magic. But anyway, yeah, let's see how that place is."

They found the club with little trouble. As they neared it, they could hear pulsing bass beats from within. The line was long—at least a hundred Muggles stood impatiently, waiting to enter.

Sirius tugged Desi's hand, leading her around the corner to the empty alleyway. The others followed. With six simultaneous pops, they Apparated into the club.

Desi looked around the interior with a sense of wonder. Every color one could possibly imagine was displayed, either on the walls, in the lights, or in the clothes of the patrons. On stage, a band played a disco version of a Beatles song. Desi smiled as a tall blonde man nearby winked in her direction.

"This place is great," Lily said. She and Desi dipped and wiggled to the beat of the music, laughing at the expressions on the faces of the men.

Desi took Sirius by the hem of his white t-shirt and pulled him toward the dance floor. Sirius shook his head.

"Oh no," he drawled, smiling. "I don't think so, Diz."

"Dance with me," she said, closing the distance between them and wrapping her arms around his waist, tucking her hands into his back pockets. "Come on."

She batted her eyelashes in a futile attempt to change his mind, but still he hesitated. Desi rolled her eyes and let go of him, bumping him with her hip as she walked past him. Her gaze then settled on her next victim.

"Remus?"

Remus looked at the dance floor with apprehension. He sighed as Sirius laughed. "Desi…"

The Beatles song ended and the band began playing Dancing Queen by ABBA.

"Right," Desi said, crossing her arms over her chest. She stood next to Lily, who mirrored her pose. "This is a new song by one of my favorite bands. I _will _be dancing to it. So one of you lot's got about 10 seconds to ask me and Lily to dance before we start asking some of these other fellas."

The seconds ticked by and Desi raised her eyebrows as the boys stood there, shuffling their feet. Lily looked at her with a smug expression.

"Shall we?" she asked.

"We shall," Desi replied, turning on her heel and walking to a nearby table. She approached the tall blonde man from earlier and tapped him on the shoulder. "Excuse me?"

He turned around and eyed her curiously. "Yes?"

"Would you and your friend like to dance with us?" Desi asked. "Our friends refuse."

The blonde looked at her and Lily, and then over Desi's shoulder toward the others. He looked back and smiled at a red-haired older man.

"Sure," the blonde said, taking Desi's hand. "Come on, honey."

He led her to the dance floor. The redhead followed Lily and picked a spot near Desi and her partner.

Sirius watched the scene with a growing sense of jealousy. He strode to a high table and sat down, all the while keeping his eyes on Desi and the blonde. He frowned when the Muggle preformed some ridiculous maneuver with his hands, making Desi laugh.

A waitress walked past and Sirius snatched a drink from her tray. A look at James told him that he wasn't the only one displeased by the attention the two Muggles were giving the girls.

"You two look like you're ready to explode," Remus commented dryly.

"Well it certainly didn't take her long, did it?" Sirius demanded. "She was here all of, what? Ten minutes? I saw him wink at her when we arrived. I bet he thought I wasn't paying attention."

"Probably not," James said. "Like flies they are. Only they don't know that our girls are the most vicious of spiders." He shook his head.

"Now they're weaving their webs around those poor unsuspecting Muggles," Sirius continued.

"It's enough to make you pity the poor sods," James chimed in, eyeing the laughing redhead balefully as he dipped Lily. "I bet the girls didn't even tell them that they had boyfriends."

"I wouldn't think that it would matter," Remus said with a chuckle. He grinned apologetically as Sirius and James turned to look at him.

"What's with the amusement, then?" Sirius asked.

"Well…look around you, Padfoot. Notice anything?"

Sirius looked around at the brightly dressed patrons. He looked over Peter's head toward the bar, and then looked back at James. "What am I missing?"

James scanned the crowd and looked at Remus curiously. "Out with it, Moony. You look like the cat that ate the canary."

"Neither of you notice the curious lack of females in the crowd?" Remus asked.

"Well," James said, looking around with a frown. He lifted his hand to point at a woman only to see that it was, in fact, a man.

Sirius, too, was rescanning the patrons. "Are you saying…surely not…"

"Merlin's beard!" Peter squeaked.

Remus laughed heartily. "You three are quite unobservant."

"Well, it's just…I mean…" James floundered for words.

The song ended and the boys turned their attention back to the dance floor. Sirius growled as Desi and Lily hugged their dance partners, which would make any self-respecting boyfriend jealous. His jealousy evaporated in the next instant, however, when the redhead and the blonde wrapped their arms around each other's waists and strode back to their table.

Lily and Desi made it back to the table, laughing loudly and using each other as a crutch. They climbed into the tall chairs surrounding the table.

"You boys missed out," Lily said.

"Oh, I haven't had fun like that in ages," Desi said, slipping off her shoe and rubbing her toes. She wiped her eyes as she finally stopped laughing. "Michael and Raul were quite the gentlemen. And fabulous dancers."

"You almost incited a riot," Remus said, taking a drink of Sirius's brandy. "Poor Sirius was apoplectic, you saucy tarts."

That sent the girls into another round of laughs.

"He winked at you," Sirius defended. "How was I supposed to know you weren't his type?"

"He was winking at _you_," Desi hiccupped through her laughs, clutching her side. "He thought you were a right delicious dish."

She sighed and blew her bangs out of her face as she calmed down. She giggled as Lily dabbed at her eyes, trying not to smear her makeup.

"See? Out of Hogwarts for less than a day and already an adventure," Desi said. She fanned her face. "It's hot in here though, isn't it?"

"A bit," Lily agreed. "Do you want to leave?"

"Yes," the men said as one.

Lily rolled her eyes. Desi smiled.

"Come on," she said. "Let's go see if we can find a cinema."

* * *

It was late when the group climbed the stoop outside of Sirius's house.

"Everyone find a room and claim a bed," Sirius said, waving a hand and sinking down onto the sofa in the corner.

Desi eyed the bare walls and old curtains with a grimace. "Looks like I've got my work cut out for me then," she said, standing in front of Sirius.

"What?" he asked. A look of understanding crossed his features when she smiled. "Ah, yes. The decorating."

He sat up and slipped his fingers into the belt loops at her hips, pulling her down to straddle his lap.

"It isn't really necessary, you know. This place isn't used for anything other than sleep. You don't have to—"

"I know," Desi said, putting her finger against his lips. "But I want to. This is your place, Sirius. It could be a nice home if you put a little work into it."

He kissed her fingertip and gently pulled her hand away, lacing his fingers with hers.

"I've got a home, Desi. This is just a house. My home's a beautiful place," he said quietly, brushing a strand of hair over her shoulder. "It's warm and inviting, and has enough heart and love to last a lifetime."

She smiled and leaned forward until her lips were a breath away from his. "Sirius Black, are you playing at being romantic?"

"I'm telling the truth," he said, keeping his eyes on hers. "You are the only home I could ever need, Des."

"If that doesn't get you some serious play, mate, I don't know what will."

Desi jumped at the sound of James's voice coming from the doorway. She chuckled as she shifted off Sirius's lap.

Sirius threw a pillow at James. "Bugger off, Potter," he said.

"Good night, you two," Remus said, shoving James aside. He winked at them and pulled the sliding door closed.

Silence stretched between them as Sirius and Desi looked at each other.

"I s'pose we should call it a night," Desi said. "If we're meeting Dumbledore's man tomorrow we should be rested."

"Yeah," Sirius agreed absently. "S'pose so. Could be a big day."

Desi stood and walked to the door, stopping with her hand on the handle. She took a deep breath and looked back at Sirius. She opened her mouth to speak but stopped, thinking, and then tried again.

"Did you mean it? What you just said?"

"Yeah," Sirius said. "Who knows what Dumbledore's got in store for tomorrow."

"That's not what I'm talking about and you know it," Desi said, frowning. "I'm being real, Sirius. Did you mean it, or were you just looking for a score tonight?"

Sirius's blue eyes darkened. He stood and slowly stalked toward her, his movements deliberate and catlike. He placed one hand on the door beside her head and leaned his body forward, invading her space unapologetically.

"If I was only after a score, Dizzy," he said, leaning his face close to hers before continuing. "I would scarce have to put any effort into my seduction."

He stepped forward and brought his other hand up to brace against the door, pinning her against his body. Desi's breath left in a rush as heat coursed through her.

"Don't you agree?" he whispered against her lips.

"You're such a wank—"

Her unflattering whisper was cut short when Sirius crushed his mouth to hers. Desi groaned against his lips, the sound both demanding and submissive. He kissed her long and hard, the way a man was supposed to kiss a woman who challenged his motives. The kiss was full of emotion—passion, longing, earnestness, and love. Both parties were breathless when Sirius pulled away.

"I'll take that to mean you meant it," Desi croaked. She cleared her throat and smiled.

"You'd be correct," Sirius replied with a nod, placing a chaste kiss on the tip of her nose. "You should get to your bed," he said, "before I take you to mine."

Desi's cheeks flushed as she shivered. She hoped Sirius took no notice of either action. She nodded and opened the door, looking back over her shoulder.

"Good night."

"G'night," Sirius replied.

He waited for her to disappear upstairs before tucking his hands in his pockets and walking around the empty downstairs portion of the house. He supposed it wouldn't hurt to get some new curtains for the place. Perhaps put a few pictures on the wall.

"I draw the line at flowers," Sirius said aloud, scowling. "I'll not have her womaning up the place."

He nodded at his reflection in a window to reiterate his authority. Shaking his head at himself with a crooked grin, Sirius turned out the light and went upstairs to seek out a bed of his own.

He would go to sleep a teenager but tomorrow when he went to bed, he would be a warrior. Their lives would change drastically with the meeting of Dumbledore's man and the initiation into the underground that fought against Voldemort. Hopefully, with time, they would be invited into the Order of the Phoenix.

Sirius lay down on the soft mattress and stacked his hands behind his head. His mind raced, but just as the first fingers of dawn crept over the horizon, he managed to sink into a peaceful sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**_August 23,1978_**

They were pinned in an abandoned train tunnel. An informant for the Order had passed the word that Voldemort and his disciples were going to set a series of explosions that would kill thousands of Muggles in the busy streets above.

Desi swore as bright green flash flew past her, an inch away from her face. To her left she saw Remus and one of the other members of the underground, Arthur Weasley, dueling with a couple of Death Eaters.

She heard a high-pitched laugh and looked to see Gideon Prewett fighting with a mad-looking woman. Desi's brain had seconds to recognize Sirius's cousin, Bellatrix, before she had to dodge another Death Eater spell.

She whirled to the right and shouted a counter-spell, squinting against the bright burst that issued from her wand.

She heard Alice Longbottom shout a warning to Arthur and Remus seconds before the wall behind them exploded.

"Remus!" she shouted as she made her way over to the wall, barking spells and playing defense.

"He's here!" Frank Longbottom yelled. "Voldemort's here! Alice! Potter! Evans! With me!"

Desi watched as the four picked their way out of the battle and disappeared into another tunnel. She made it to Remus and assessed his wounds, noting the bleeding cuts and gashes. Nothing seemed serious, however, so she squeezed between him and Arthur.

"You look like shite, Des," Remus said with a weary grin.

"Well you don't just look like a box of candy yourself, Moony," she replied, ducking as something exploded to their right and debris rained down on them.

"Sirius'll be upset he missed this one," Remus said, peering around the corner.

"I'm sure he's having his own fun," Desi said. She looked at Arthur. "What's the plan, Artie?"

"We'll charge on my mark," Arthur said. "There's four Death Eaters taking cover beneath the platform. Two on the right side, by the pillars. I don't know about the left."

"There's at least three," Desi said. "I got a glimpse earlier. Where's the reinforcements?" she asked. "I thought Tayla was supposed—"

"She didn't make it out," Remus said.

Desi pushed her grief down and let it fester into anger. She looked at Arthur. "We need to take these assholes down so we can help the others with Voldemort."

"Wands at the ready," Arthur said.

The trio took a deep breath as one, and then pushed to their feet with a ferocious battle cry, immediately issuing attacks and defenses. They were joined by what was left of their force as they fought to save the world that was going on above them.

* * *

Voldemort escaped.

He gave the Longbottoms, James, and Lily a fight to remember and then was gone in a blast of green flame.

The cleanup process was tedious and time consuming. The trip back to headquarters was a solemn affair. The bodies of the fallen had been returned as soon as the battle was over, and the families had been notified by one of the other members.

Desi saw that everyone was taken care of and all who needed to go to the infirmary had gone. After assuring Remus and Lily that all she needed was a good shower, she went upstairs alone.

She turned on the water and undressed, stepping into the large shower stall and letting the chilly water wash away the blood and grime from the battle. She scrubbed at her skin, trying in vain to wash away the bruises that dotted her arms. She sting of the soap in her cuts and scrapes were a comfort to her—it proved she was alive.

She slicked her hair back and tilted her face toward spray. The cool rivulets mingled with her hot tears as she cried for the courageous people who were lost that day. She did her best to keep a brave face with the others, but here, alone, she let the tears fall.

She didn't know how long she stood under the spray, letting her mind wander, but she jumped slightly at the sound of a light knock on the door.

"Desi?" Sirius called. "I talked to Lily and she wanted me to come check on you. She was worried. Can I come in?"

Desi heard the click of the bathroom door as he used his wand to unlock the door, but she kept her shoulder pressed against the cool wall of the shower, not concerned with facing anyone. The stall door opened slowly and Desi lowered her head, letting her wet hair fall forward to curtain her face.

"Oh, Des…" Sirius said softly. His voice radiated concern.

Her shoulders heaved with a sob at the tone and she turned further toward the wall.

"Ssh. Baby," Sirius said, stepping into the shower, heedless of the water soaking his clothes. He wrapped her in a towel and put his arms around her wet shoulders, pulling her to him. "It's ok."

She clung to his shirt and cried. Sirius knelt slowly, bringing her down with him so that she sat across his lap. He reached forward to turn off the spray and continued holding her like one comforting a child.

Sirius stroked her back and petted her hair, letting her shed the tears that had been held back for far too long. Desi felt things more deeply than most of the people Sirius had ever met. Every feeling she felt, she felt with her entire being. It was one of the things that drew his attention when they were children at Hogwarts—she had been so easy to irritate—and it was one of the things that made him fall so completely in love with her when he had stopped being such an idiot.

"Ssh…I've got you, Desi. I've got you. Hey," he said, lifting her chin and brushing his thumbs over her cheeks. He gave her a small smile. "You helped save a load of Muggles today, love. Think of all those lives—all those families you helped keep together."

"Together for how long?" Desi whispered as tears filled her eyes again. "I'm…I'm not sure we're going to win this, Sirius. I know we'll never give up and I know we'll fight until it kills us, but I don't even know that the Order can defeat Voldemort. He's just…he's too—"

"We will defeat him, Desi," Sirius said earnestly. "If any or all of us should die trying, so be it. But we _will_ defeat him. In the end, good always wins," he said with another small smile. "Or don't you know that?" he asked, tucking a chunk of wet hair behind her ear.

"I know," Desi said dispiritedly. She paused and cleared her throat. "Any of the people we lost today…any one of them could have been you or Remus or Lily or James."

Sirius shifted and took a deep breath. "But it wasn't. We knew the risks when we signed up."

"I know that. And I'd never leave the Order. What we do is too important. It's just…sometimes I'm afraid. That's all."

"You'd be a fool if you weren't," he said simply.

"I know," she said again, this time with a sigh. "I'm sorry I'm breaking down on you," she said, leaning her cheek against his chest.

"Oh, hang it," Sirius admonished, bringing his arms around her. "If I can't soothe you during the occasional breakdown, what purpose do I serve?" He chuckled and kissed the top of her head.

He held her for a long while, both of them silent. Sirius closed his eyes, thinking Desi had drifted off to sleep.

"Sirius," she whispered.

"Hm?"

"I don't want to watch you die."

"Listen to me," Sirius said, moving her so that she was facing him. "I'm not going to die. James and Remus and Lily, they're not going to die. You're not going to die. We're all too good at what we do," he said, shaking his head. "Hell, James and Lily have been taken in by Frank and Alice Longbottom, for God's sake. They're the best Aurors in two centuries. You think ol' Dumbledore just throws us into the fray without thinking?"

"Of course not," Desi said, frowning.

"Of course not," Sirius repeated. "Dumbledore knows. He knows James and Lily are the best young wizards around—much as it pains me to admit it," he added with a trademark grin. "That's why he put 'em with the Longbottoms. He knows that I'm a right sneaky bastard and good with a wand. That's why he sends me out on search and destroys. And he knows that you and Remus are responsible, intelligent, and levelheaded. That's why he puts you in on the strategic attacks."

Desi was quiet as she processed what he told her. Her eyes narrowed the more she thought about it.

Apparently, Sirius had everything figured out. He was beyond confident—he was cocky. But then, what else was new? Why would he change in the face of death and destruction?

Well she was a tough wee cookie too, wasn't she?

With a new sense of resolve, Desi tucked her hair behind her ear and pushed herself to her feet, securing her sopping towel around her chest.

"You ok then?" Sirius asked, lightly rubbing the back of her leg.

"Yeah," she said, holding her hand down to him. "I'll be damned if I turn into a weeping willow just because Voldemort is off his onion and trying to take over the world."

Sirius took her hand with a grin and she helped him to his feet, pulling his mouth down to hers and surprising him with a deep kiss. "Thank you," she said against his mouth, nibbling on his bottom lip.

"Glad I could be of service," Sirius said, sliding his hands over her hips and cupping her butt, bringing her more fully against him. He kissed her again, growling as someone knocked on the bathroom door.

"Desi? Are you still in there?"

"I'm here, Lil. I'll be out in a second."

"Have you seen Sirius? James and Peter are looking for him," Lily called.

Sirius sighed and stepped away from Desi. He unbuttoned his shirt and shrugged out of it, letting it drop onto the shower floor with a wet plop. He stepped out and ran a dry towel over his chest before passing it to Desi and pulling the shower door shut behind him.

Desi heard him open the bathroom door and heard Lily gasp.

"Oh."

"Yes, 'oh'," Sirius said. "I'm glad James is better with magic than he is with timing. Tell him I'll be down as soon as I change," he muttered, pulling the bathroom door shut as he left.

Desi dried off and wiped the fog from the mirror, crinkling her nose as she peered into it. Her eyes were puffy and her nose was pink from crying. She brushed her hair back from her face and braided it, eyeing her bruised and battered arms in the mirror.

She stared at her reflection stonily and took a deep breath. "You'll not be getting the best of me again," she said savagely, as if Voldemort could hear her. "Brace yourself, because my mates and I are about to seriously cock-up your plans."

She tossed her hairbrush onto the counter and turned away from the mirror, gathering up her dirty clothes and leaving the bathroom.


	4. Chapter 4

_December 16, 1978_

Sirius lit a cigarette and tossed his hair out of his eyes. He shrugged deeper into his jacket and sniffed. He took a drag from the cigarette and exhaled a thin, steady stream of smoke.

Beside him, Peter Pettigrew walked doggedly, taking an occasional nip from a silver flask. "Sirius, where are we going? Why can't we just use Apparition?"

Desi followed along behind them and rolled her eyes at Pettigrew's lazy reliance on magic.

"It's called fresh air, Wormtail," Sirius droned. "It's good for you."

"It's bloody freezing," Peter muttered.

"Where _are_ we going?" Desi asked.

"Christmas shopping, Diz. Christmas shopping," Sirius said, glancing over his shoulder with a grin.

"We're in the middle of the warehouse division," Desi said. "Are we getting someone a truckload of stolen merchandise for Christmas?" she asked sweetly.

Sirius blew another stream of smoke and stopped, eyeing Desi with a grin. "You're so negative," he teased. "Did you ever stop to think that maybe—"

Sirius's though was cut short by the sound of a wild cackle. The sound sent chills down Desi's spine.

"That's Bellatrix," she whispered, drawing her wand. "I really hate your cousin, Sirius."

"She's not my favorite person either," Sirius said. He and Peter drew their wands. "Backs to the building," he hissed, pulling Desi back out of the open area.

They crept along the warehouse, watching for signs of the Death Eaters.

"Sirius, let's go," Peter whispered. "We should get reinforcements."

"We don't know how many are actually here," Sirius pointed out. He looked intently at Desi, who tilted her head uncertainly.

"It's your call," she said.

Sirius nodded. "Wormtail, go back to the Order and get some volunteers."

Peter closed his eyes and Disapparated with a _crack_.

"Des, you and I will try to get a headcount. Do not engage anyone unless they see you. Got it?"

Desi nodded and followed Sirius as he led the way around the corner. They picked their way around overturned barrels and piles of garbage while taking care to keep their footsteps light on the gravel.

Strategies raced through Sirius and Desi's minds. If they knew the Death Eaters' location, they could sift to somewhere nearby and watch them. As it was, the duo was left to hunt out the evil wizards on foot.

Another screech of Bellatrix's laughter echoed between the warehouses, followed by the deep murmur of a male voice. Another voice, also male, laughed and shouted, but the reverberations distorted his words.

Sirius pointed at Desi and then pointed to the warehouse on the right, lifting his finger and indicating to her where she needed to position herself. Desi broke off and slipped silently around the front of the building. She climbed a fire escape and took position on the roof.

As she peered over the side, she saw three Death Eaters standing inside a circle of barrel fires. In the midst was a battered young man in a suit, on his knees before them.

"_Crucio_!"

Desi's stomach rolled as one of the males performed the Cruciatus curse on the businessman. Bellatrix laughed, bouncing up and down on her toes and clapping, her mask making the sound of her laughter hollow and haunting.

The young victim's mouth was open in a silent scream, his body bowing and thrashing into unnatural positions, as the most excruciating pain imaginable possessed his mind.

"_Avada Kedavra_!"

Bellatrix huffed as the other male Death Eater interrupted the torturous fun.

"Enough," the man said. "We've wasted too much time already."

"Oh," Bellatrix groaned sulkily as she took off her mask. "You never let us have any fun anymore, Reggie."

Desi's skin went cold. "Regulus," she whispered sadly.

The thinner male removed his mask and shook his head. "Bellatrix is right. I'd hate to think you were losing your edge, Regulus," he said challengingly.

Regulus raised his wand and raked his mask off in one fluid motion, his young face contorted with rage.

"You would do well to watch your tongue, Barty, or you'll see just how sharp my edge still is."

"Children," Bellatrix said, stepping between them and laying a hand on Regulus's wand hand. "Let's not fight."

Barty and Regulus lowered their wands slowly but still eyed each other with unmasked hatred.

The three Death Eaters turned simultaneously toward a noise that sounded to Desi's left. They instantly sprang into action, using their magic to sift from place to place, moving so quickly that they were hardly visible to the naked eye.

Desi rushed to the side to see what had caused the noise. Certainly Sirius wouldn't have made such a blunder. To her horror, she saw Sirius in his Animagus form on the other side of a barrel. He had apparently shifted forms when he realized the Death Eaters had been alerted.

"It's just a mutt," Barty said, stepping from the shadows.

Padfoot backed away slowly, eyeing Barty with unease. When Regulus stepped into the light, the dog froze and then began growling low in his throat.

"Don't Sirius," Desi whispered pleadingly.

"Here doggie, doggie, doggie," Bellatrix chanted, sifting to appear right behind Padfoot. He snapped at her and she hissed with anger, pulling her wand.

Desi reacted instinctively. She drew her wand and shouted, "_Expelliarmus_!"

As Bellatrix's wand flew from her hand and Padfoot ran around the corner to shift back into his human form, the three Death Eaters looked up in astonishment. After a brief second they began to retaliate, sifting and shouting curses as they flew.

Desi closed her eyes and used Apparition to get to the ground. She saw that Sirius had returned and was holed up inside one of the buildings, having pinned Barty behind a trash bin in the alley. She saw that Bellatrix was on top of the right side warehouse, looking for a way in that wouldn't alert Sirius. That left Regulus…

She looked around, searching the shadows for any sign of the young Death Eater. She saw a flutter of cloak and followed him into the last building. She stopped, listening for him to make himself known.

She heard it then—the slightest tread of a footstep on the concrete. Tightening the grip on her wand, she whirled around and shouted a defensive spell at the same time he shouted an attack.

The spells met with a multicolored explosion, throwing both of the wizards to the ground.

Desi regained her feet first, ignoring the aches in her body. She pointed her wand at Regulus. He grinned at her and wiped his bloody mouth, a cold mockery of the mischievous smile that his brother so often gave.

"Well done, little mudblood," he said. Desi's chin lifted slightly at the offensive term. "Looks like you've won."

"It didn't have to be this way, Regulus. At any time you could have chosen—"

"Chosen? When have I chosen anything?" he barked. "In school you picked me as your personal charity case because you had intentions of saving me from the Dark Arts. I never asked for your attention, Muggleborn. I never asked to be saved."

"I suppose not," Desi said stonily. "Stand up, Regulus. I'm holding you for the Order. Let the Ministry deal with you, because I'm done."

He stood slowly and raised his chin defiantly, looking at her with a cool arrogance born of years of praise and privilege. Something else flashed in his eyes at Desi's words, something unidentifiable.

Desi walked Regulus out of the building, holding her wand at his back. She heard several loud pops followed by shouting voices from the other side of the first warehouse.

"That'll be the backup Peter went for," Desi said. "And judging from the lack of spells being called, I'd say your Death Eater mates ran off and left you."

"Desi!"

Desi relaxed at the sound of Sirius's voice. "I'm here!" she called. "Come on, Regulus," she said.

Regulus refused to move forward. Desi frowned and circled him, raising her wand slightly.

"Don't make me petrify you and drag you over," she threatened.

Regulus cut his eyes at her, his mouth set in a grim line. He looked older, wearier, than a child of 18 should look. Desi gazed at him with a look of regret before swishing her wand in order to cast her petrification spell.

In a movement too swift to register, Regulus drew a wand that he had hidden within the folds of his cloak.

"_Stupify_!" he shouted, hitting Desi with a blast from his wand.

She flew backward and hit the wall of the warehouse hard. Her own wand was knocked out of her hand. Regulus kicked it farther from her and stared down at her with a look of smug superiority. He pointed his wand at her head and spat blood onto the ground next to her feet.

"Foolish sentiment," Regulus said disdainfully. "You should have killed me when you had the chance, Keating."

Desi struggled to sit up, ignoring the fire in her side that hinted at a broken rib. She looked up at Regulus, boldly meeting his eyes and waiting for him to issue the Killing Curse. "I don't want you dead. I suppose that should be chalked up to sentiment as well."

He looked down at her angrily, meeting her pain-filled gaze evenly. "I should kill you. My brother betrayed his family, he betrayed _me_. Your death would hurt him more than anything else would."

"So do it, Regulus. Be the man Voldemort wants you to be. I'm sure your parents would like nothing better than for you to take out the mudblood who had the audacity to be nice to you. Surely that'd get you a pat on the head."

"Shut up! Don't discuss things about which you know nothing!"

She was wounded. She was unarmed. She had threatened to turn him into the Ministry. She'd gotten him angry.

And still he hesitated.

Regulus jerked his eyes toward the sound of approaching footsteps. Someone was running to Desi's aid. He raised his wand again and gripped it tightly, crying out furiously as he lowered it to his side and Disapparated at the same time Sirius came barreling around the corner.

Sirius shouted a freezing spell, but Regulus had already disappeared before he finished speaking. He cursed viciously, rushing to Desi's side and helping her to her feet, cursing again when she cried out in pain.

"If I ever see that bastard again, I swear I'll—"

Desi cut him off. "Hush, Sirius," she said. "It's just a broken rib. Broken bones can be mended."

He wrapped his arms around her, wincing when she swore loudly. "Sorry, love. Come on. Let's get back to the others. Dumbledore will want a report. The clean-up crew is already taking care of the poor bugger they killed."

He put an arm around her waist and helped usher her around the warehouse.

"Sirius? Why were we in the warehouse district?"

Sirius grinned. "I was thinking about buying one of these old buildings for Dumbledore. Sort of a secondary base or something. He could have decided what he wanted to use it for. I was just looking for a good one, far away from prying eyes. Thought now that we're in the Order, it'd be nice."

"You wanted to buy Dumbledore a building for Christmas?" Desi asked. "If you buy a building for your boss, I can't wait to see what you get your girlfriend."

Sirius chuckled, but sobered as he noticed how pale Desi was. "Can you Apparate?"

"I think so," she said. "It's just a—"

"A broken rib. I know. But you have a bad habit of downplaying things, Des."

"I'll be alright," she said. "I'll see you at headquarters."

Sirius nodded and waited until she had Disapparated before following with a _pop_.

* * *

Desi winced as the infirmary wizard poked at her bruised side with his unnaturally cold hands.

"Well, the bones are mended nicely," the doctor said. "But you'll have a bit of bruising that'll have to heal naturally. Otherwise, Miss Keating, I'd say you're perfectly fit to return to duty."

"Thanks," Desi said, slipping from the table. She grabbed up her shirt and slipped it over her head as she pulled back the curtain that separated her from the rest of the infirmary. She gasped when she almost ran headlong into Dumbledore and Sirius.

"Ah, Miss Keating," Dumbledore said, taking her by the shoulders to steady her. "Feeling better, I presume?"

"Absolutely, sir. It'd take more than a run-in with a wall to take me off active duty," she said, smiling.

"It wasn't just a run-in with a wall, Desi. Regulus was more than ready to kill you. But like a coward he—"

"I'm not so certain he would have killed me," Desi interjected. "He could have performed the Killing Curse at any time—"

"And if he'd had a few more seconds—" Sirius began, his voice rising heatedly.

Desi got even louder. "I still don't think he would have!"

Both Sirius and Desi were silenced when Dumbledore raised his hand. Each eyed the other balefully.

"Whatever the cause of young Regulus's hesitation, I am grateful," Dumbledore said with a small nod. "Nevertheless, Miss Keating, I do tend to agree with Sirius in this matter. The fact that you narrowly escaped with your life is something that should be taken seriously."

"But sir—"

Dumbledore continued as if she hadn't interrupted him, but Desi saw Sirius's frown deepen.

"Whatever Regulus's motives were for allowing you to live, none of us know. All we have to take into account is that he is, in fact, a Death Eater. He did, in fact, kill an innocent Muggle tonight—"

"And therefore ended the man's torture! Bellatrix and Barty were taking far too much pleasure in using the Cruciatus curse."

"I believe what Dumbledore is saying is—"

"What I am saying," Dumbledore said, interrupting Sirius, "is that the important thing about tonight's encounter is that you and Sirius were not overly harmed. Though you could not save the life of the poor Muggle, we were able to get an identification of him to the Auror office and they are handling the investigation. Perhaps with that information we will know something of Voldemort's plans. I think now it is best if we all go home for the evening," he said, subtly ending the conversation and turning to leave.

"Professor Dumbledore?"

Dumbledore stopped and looked at Desi. "I am no longer your professor, Miss Keating," he said with a small chuckle.

"Sorry, sir. Old habits," Desi said, smiling. She sobered. "Sir, I was wondering if there has been any word on Remus. I only ask because…well, the moon's full next week, you see…"

Dumbledore smiled politely. "He's due back tomorrow, Miss Keating. I carefully took Mr. Lupin's condition under consideration when I assigned him to his task."

"I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to imply that you didn't," Desi said quickly, blushing. "It's just that—"

"Dizzy has a bit of a control problem," Sirius said, smiling icily at Desi. "Yes, she's very motherly in many respects."

"Yes, well, time to be off home, I think," Dumbledore said. He was definitely not a fool He could see by the stubborn set of Sirius's jaw and the narrowing of Desi's eyes that this was going to be a very long discussion, and one that he did not want to get caught up in. "I will see the both of you in the morning."

"I will see you at home," Desi said coldly.

"Can't wait," Sirius replied.

They Apparated from headquarters to their home, barely making sure that the other had arrived before they began yelling at each other.

"You are the most stubborn—"

"I can't believe you would call me motherly—"

"—hardheaded—"

"—stupid prat! Control issues?—"

"—woman I've ever met _in my life_! I don't understand why—"

"—_show_ you control issues!"

"—can't just let things go like a normal person! Where are you going?" Sirius shouted as Desi turned and stomped from the living room.

"To bed. _Alone_," Desi stressed. "Looks like you'll have to find someone less _controlling_ to shag, eh?"

"Desi," Sirius called, following her up the stairs. "You're not the only one allowed to be upset, dammit! You were nearly killed tonight!"

She whirled to face him. "Regulus was not going to kill me," she said vehemently.

Sirius clenched his fists and made a strangled sound of aggravation. "Yes he was!" he shouted incredulously. "He's a Death Eater, Desi. He adopted my parents' blood prejudice when he was four years old! He would have killed you in a heartbeat!"

"He might have thought he was going to," Desi said, turning and continuing up the stairs. She shoved open the door to her bedroom. "_I _certainly did, for a moment. But then he stopped and I saw something, Sirius. He could have killed me ten times over in the time it took you to reach us. But he didn't."

"Because he's a bloody coward and was scared of what I'd do to him if he did!"

"Bullshit!" Desi shouted. "He didn't because…well, I don't exactly know why. But I think deep down there is still some good in him, Sirius. Maybe there's room for hope."

"There is no room for hope," Sirius said savagely. "Not for Regulus."

"You're an obstinate, unyielding idiot who closes his mind to reason," Desi said. She shook her head sadly. "You're his brother, Sirius."

"I'm not," he said, snatching up a bottle of Fire Whiskey from the bedside table and twisting the cap viciously. "Not as far as they're concerned." He pointed a finger at Desi. "And you're nothing but a sentimental fool who doesn't know what she's talking about."

His words cut deep, but she stubbornly refused to show it.

"Funny," she said bitingly. "You say I'm a sentimental fool. Regulus said I was foolishly sentimental. Amazing, don't you think, the depth of sibling similarities?"

She stalked to the old mahogany wardrobe and pulled out a jumper and some jeans before crossing to the dresser and pulling out some underclothes.

"What are you doing?" Sirius demanded, taking a pull from the bottle.

"I'm going to Lily's for the night," she replied. "I'm too angry to sleep and you've got your old friend there to keep you company," she said, pointing to the bottle. "So it will just be better if I…get out for a while. Before we say anything else we won't mean tomorrow."

"I haven't said anything that I won't mean tomorrow," Sirius said harshly, plopping on the bed and crossing his ankles.

Desi clenched her jaw but remained silent as she packed her bag. Slinging the strap over her shoulder, she tucked her wand into the back pocket of her jeans.

"Goodnight, Sirius," she said.

He distractedly waved a hand in her direction. The sound of her Disapparation made Sirius flinch. He rolled onto his side and sat the bottle of whiskey back on the table. He stared at the wall, sighing deeply. Her bed smelled like she did, like trees and grass and sunshine.

He wondered idly if his bed smelled like her too.

It seemed that regardless of who it was, he always managed to fight with the people closest to him. How long would it be before Desi got tired of his crap and stayed gone?

Sirius rolled onto his back and stacked his hands behind his head. He closed his eyes, though he had no intention of sleeping.

He knew what he had to do…

* * *

"Are you alright?" Lily asked Desi over lunch.

"Hm?" Desi asked absently.

"I said, are you alright?" Lily repeated. "You've been a bit out of it all day. You didn't even respond to James's teasing earlier."

"Oh," Desi said. "Well, I've just been…distracted."

"Thinking of a way to apologize to Sirius?" Lily asked.

"Me apologize?" Desi asked, affronted. "Why should I be the one to apologize?"

"Because, from what you've told me you basically started it," Lily said regretfully.

"I don't know that I _started_ it," Desi muttered, "but I do _suppose_ I could have handled things a bit differently."

Lily nodded and took a bite of her sandwich. "So is he still angry?"

"I don't rightly know," Desi said. "I've only managed to catch a glimpse of him. He was in with Dumbledore all morning, but I saw him in the meeting room. He sat clear on the other side. I don't suppose that's a good sign."

Peter and James walked past the table, talking to a lovely squib named Arabella Figg. Desi caught Peter's sleeve as he passed.

"Have you seen Sirius?"

Peter shrugged. "Not since this morning."

"I saw him a bit ago," James said. "Said he was ducking out and going home. Had some stuff to take care of."

Desi nodded and said her thanks, picking at her food as the boys continued on after Arabella.

"Maybe he's just feeling a bit pouty," Lily said hopefully.

"Maybe. But…I dunno, Lil. I've got that feeling."

"Oh dear," Lily said.

"You know I don't put much stock into the psychic realm," Desi said. "But you also know that when I get _that_ feeling…"

"Something bad happens," Lily said. "I know. So what are you gonna do?"

"I guess I'll go back home and…apologize," Desi said, saying the word as if it left a bad taste in her mouth.

Lily laughed. "Ok then. Let me know if you need anything."

"I will."

Desi cleaned up her lunch mess and left the courtyard. She decided to walk most of the way home rather than use magic. It would give her time to think through what she was going to say.

By the time she reached the house, she had her apology perfectly scripted. Assuming he reacted to her dialogue the way she anticipated—she knew him very well, and was therefore quite confident that he would—they would be right as rain in no time.

She opened the front door and called a greeting. Silence greeted her in return.

"Sirius?"

Desi frowned. Suddenly uneasy, she drew her wand and checked the downstairs. Nothing was out of place. She crept upstairs, taking care to step over the stair with the squeaky board. She searched her room, the guest room, and the bathroom, but nothing was amiss. She opened the door to Sirius's room and lowered her wand as her eyes landed on the cause of her misgivings.

The door to Sirius's closet was open, the space inside stripped bare.

Desi moved toward the bed, noticing a piece of parchment lying in the center. She picked it up with a trembling hand and scanned the familiar scrawl.

_Des—_

_I have a mission coming up in a few days. I am not certain how long I will be gone. To be honest, the only reason I got it is because out of everyone that volunteered, I was the only one without a family. Doesn't bolster confidence, eh? As it is, I want you to stay in the house. It suits you better than it does me. Besides, all those little things you have laying about would get all dusty and we both know that I'd never clean them._

_Anyway, I moved my things to Remus's. __Thought it'd be best if_

_I didn't want to be in the_

_I figured I'd best beat you to the draw and_

_It's easier this way._

_-Sirius_

Desi crumpled the piece of paper in her fist. The bitterness of heartbreak mixed with a burning sense of anger. The helplessness of the situation beckoned tears to her eyes, and they rolled down her cheeks unchecked.

She stormed to the roll top desk in the corner and took out a piece of parchment and a quill, leaning against the solid oak as she scribbled a note of her own.

_Sirius—_

_This is your house. __ I will not be compensated like a red-light whore. My things will be cleared out by the time this message reaches you. _

_Stop being such a damnable coward, hiding behind a mission for the Order._

_Desdemona_

_ PS—Try not to get your stupid self killed._

Desi summoned an owl and gave it Remus's address.

Before her emotions took hold and she let herself be a heartbroken female, she set about to busy herself with moving out her things.


	5. Chapter 5

January 5, 1979

"I can't believe you are getting married tomorrow."

Lily looked at Desi and beamed. "It's mad, isn't it?"

"It is," Desi agreed. "But in a completely wonderful way."

"Molly says the best thing she ever did was marry Arthur, even though they were really young. And now she has all her children."

"Wassamatter, Lil?" Desi asked, noting the falter in Lily's smile.

"It's just…children. Do I really have the right to bring an innocent baby into this world, the way it is right now?"

"Oh, Lily," Desi said, draping her arm over her friend's shoulders. "In the first place, it isn't like you're going to be shooting out a baby in a week."

Lily laughed and Desi smiled.

"Not to mention," she continued, "We are not gonna stop living our lives based on the state of things beyond our control. It's called hope, Lil. You gotta have hope and faith that things won't be like this forever. Hell, look at Molly," she said. "The twins make, what? Five children now? And I'll betcha double or nothing she's still got a few more in there somewhere."

They laughed again. Desi squeezed Lily's shoulders affectionately. "When you and James do start a family, it'll be incredible. And with an aunt like me, you'll be so busy keeping me from feeding it cookies and teaching it bad words that you won't pay attention to the state of anything else."

Lily sighed and leaned her head on Desi's shoulder. She jerked up suddenly and her eyes widened. "Omigod."

"What?" Desi asked, startled.

"I'm getting married tomorrow!" Lily said, as if she'd never heard the news before.

"Is this the part where you start to freak out?"

"I…I think so," Lily said. She had a slightly vacant look as she stood. "There's so much to do."

"It's a small service, Lily. There's not that—"

Lily whirled and gripped Desi by the shoulders. "Desi, you have to help me!"

"O-ok!" Desi said immediately, slightly unnerved by the wild look in Lily's eyes. Her friend had done a complete 180 from her usual calm and unshakable persona. "What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know," Lily said. "I don't know! It's my wedding and I don't know!"

"Right," Desi said shrugging out of Lily's grasp. "Ok then. Well calm down. We'll get through this." She began to pace, fiddling with the pendant on her necklace as she thought. "Right," she said again. "You've got your dress, Arabella is making the cake…what about flowers?"

"I don't have any flowers!" Lily cried. "Oh Desi!"

"Oy! Breathe," Desi said, holding up her hand. "We'll get it taken care of, Lil. Don't lose your head."

"Bugger," Lily muttered. "If we do, I'll just have all night to think of other things to panic over. Ugh, I'll be a nutter by tomorrow morning."

"We'll just keep busy," Desi said. She fingered her necklace and sat on a chair, thinking. She smiled and snapped her fingers. "Got it!"

"Oh dear."

"Don't 'oh dear' me, Evans," she said with a laugh. "It's a brilliant idea. You'll be impressed. Come on."

"Where are we going?" Lily asked, laughing.

"Downtown."

"Why don't we just use the Floo?"

"Because today we're Muggles," Desi replied, smiling. She hailed a taxi and crawled inside.

"Are we going to a florist?"

"Nope," Desi said. She gave the address to the driver, gripping the back of the passenger seat as he darted off into the London traffic.

After the longest short car ride ever, the taxi stopped. The girls thanked the driver and quickly scrambled from the taxi. Lily eyed their destination unenthusiastically.

"Des," she said. "This is a paper shop."

"I know," Desi said.

"Why are we at a paper shop? I thought we were going to get flowers."

"We're going to make flowers. Wait, wait," she said when Lily primed for an argument. "Hear me out. We have the…means," she said pointedly. All of them had passed transfiguration with flying colors. "All we need is the inanimate objects for them to stem from. Plus, it will keep us busy most of the night. _Plus_," she continued, lowering her voice, "we can make our own enchanted petals and confetti. One box of that costs 20 galleons in Diagon Alley."

Lily smiled and looped her arm through Desi's. "I'm so glad you think of these things," she said. "Come on, then. We'd better load up."

They bought paper in every color and thickness. It wouldn't matter once it was transfigured into flowers, but in keeping with the festive spirit, they decided to be colorful in their shopping. They took the boxes of paper back to the house and went to a nearby diner for some tea.

"Did Dumbledore ok your proposition?" Lily asked.

"Yep," Desi replied, taking a bite of scone. "I start teaching at the Muggle elementary school in two weeks. He agreed that infiltrating Muggle society would be beneficial to seeing how far out of the Wizarding world Voldemort reaches. He's procured documents stating that I excelled in school and graduated high school at 15."

"Wow. I always knew you were a right brainiac," Lily said. "So…Sirius is back," she mentioned hesitantly, sipping her tea. "According to McGonagall, the information he gathered is going to be used to deliver a powerful blow to Voldemort."

"I'd heard," Desi said. "I'm glad he made it back in time for the wedding."

"You'll be ok, won't you?"

Desi knew that since Sirius was back home James would have him as Best Man. She wouldn't expect anything less. She only hoped that they could overcome the awkwardness that was sure to come up at some point during the day.

"I'll be fine, Lil. It isn't as if Sirius and I hate each other or anything. Actually, tonight will be the first time we've spent more than a few minutes in each other's company since I moved out. He's been gone on assignment for weeks," she reminded her.

"Well, I sent an owl to James while you were unloading the paper earlier. He and the boys are to come help make flowers tonight. From his reply I think they're planning on making a party out of it."

* * *

It was quite a party, indeed. James, Remus, Peter, and Sirius arrived at Lily's house with enough food to feed an army, or at the very least, four slightly sotted young men. After four hours of transfiguring puffs of paper into roses of various colors while casually drinking Fire Whiskey and Inkicap Rum, the six of them were a bit tipsy.

Sirius left the table where he had just finished transfiguring a blue rose—with two buds—and began to pilfer through Lily's record collection.

"Oy, who's The Cure?" he called.

"They're a Muggle band," Lily replied, bringing in a fresh tray of pumpkin pasties. "All of those from that shelf are Muggles."

"Probably mostly punk. Nothing worth dancing to," Desi said.

"But still good," Lily countered.

"What kind of names are these?" Sirius asked, frowning. "Siouxsie and the Banshees. The Clash. The Sex Pistols?" he said, pulling out the record and looking at the cover. He pointed to the two men on the cover. "'oo's that?"

"That's Johnny Rotten and Sid Vicious," Desi said, taking the record from him and slipping it back on the shelf. "The Sex Pistols wouldn't be your cuppa tea," she said. "But you might like this."

"Wha' is it?"

"The Clash. Shut up and listen," she said, gathering plates and cups onto a tray. "I'm going to wash these up," she told Lily. "Keep working."

"She's a bloody tyrant," Remus muttered.

"She's saving me money, so shut it," Lily said with a laugh.

Desi went into the kitchen and let the door swing shut behind her. She didn't look up from the sink of dishes when someone else came in.

"Did you even notice I've been gone?" Sirius asked.

"Have you?" she asked.

"Very funny," he said, his tone implying the opposite. When she didn't say anything else he held his arms out at his side. "I took your advice," he said.

She looked over her shoulder at him quizzically. "What advice was that?" she asked, scanning him from head to toe. "Let a caterpillar die on your lip?"

"Lily said my mustache made me look quite dashing, thank you very much," he said, running his fingers over the ends.

"That's because she's getting married," Desi said with a chuckle. "She's not in her right mind. What advice did I give you?"

"I didn't get my stupid self killed," he said.

Desi turned around and wiped her soapy hands on her hips. She tilted her head to the side and studied him, debating with herself on how to respond.

"I'm glad of that," she said at length. "Ridiculous mustache aside," she added with a grin.

"It makes me look like a sophisticate," he said, straightening his velvet waistcoat with an aristocratic sniff and a grin.

"It makes you look like a git," Desi said, turning back to her dishes.

She squealed and laughed as arms closed around her and Sirius rubbed his mustachioed face on the side of her neck. Desi scooped up a mug of dishwater and held it aloft as she slipped from Sirius's arms.

"Somebody seems to be awfully ticklish today," Sirius said.

She laughed and raised the mug threateningly. "Don't do it, Black," she said, seeing the mischievous gleam that came into his blue eyes.

Sirius grinned and feinted to the right, catching Desi again as she moved the other way. Desi squeaked and brought the cup toward him, cursing in her laughter as he caught her wrist and made half of the cup's contents spill on both of them.

"What's going on in—"

Sirius and Desi both burst into laughter as the rest of the water flung from the mug and hit Remus in the face.

Remus wiped his face with his shirt and eyed the equally wet duo reproachfully. "Lily said I'm supposed to tell you two to quit mucking about and come make some more roses. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go get dry."

"Ah, Moony, you're dry enough, mate," Sirius said.

Remus rolled his eyes and left the kitchen.

"Guess we'd better get back out there," Sirius said when he'd gone.

"Yeah, you go on," Desi said. "I'm gonna finish up here."

Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He shook his head slightly and smiled, backing through the door and leaving Desi alone in the kitchen.

When the door was closed, Desi turned back to the sink of dishes and sighed, closing her eyes. It had come easy, the teasing banter between her and Sirius. For a moment, the two of them were a single unit again, each feeding from the other's wit.

She huffed out a breath and attacked a serving bowl with vigor.

She could pretend that she didn't miss Sirius, she told herself. As long as he didn't see through her, everything would be fine.

* * *

The wedding itself went off without a hitch. The ceremony was beautiful. Both the bride and her maid cried like babies. The minister blessed the union of James and Lily Potter, releasing the newly bound couple into the world. James led Lily to the reception hall, followed by the best man and the maid of honor.

Then it all went to pieces.

James called for the band to strike up the first dance. Lily's eyes filled with tears as the opening chords of Love Me Tender began.

"This is the song that her mother and father danced to at their wedding," Desi said quietly. "I don't know how a wizard band is familiar with it."

"Well, I suppose they had the music," Sirius said, taking a bite of cake.

"How would they—" Sirius looked at Desi innocently and waited for her to continue. "Did you do this?" she asked.

"I might have had a hand in it," Sirius replied, shoveling more cake into his mouth.

"But that's so…out of character," Desi said.

Sirius smiled and set his plate on a table. "Dizzy dear, when are you going to come to terms with the fact that I have no set character?"

"The bride and groom request that the best man and maid of honor join them on the dance floor."

Desi turned to the stage where the singer was standing. Lily and James stood on the floor in front of him with matching smirks.

All eyes looked expectantly at Desi and Sirius. He held out a hand to her and winked, pulling her into his arms.

"Thank you," Desi whispered as they swayed to the song. "I don't know why you did this, but it means a lot."

"I did it because Lily is my friend and I love her. I've heard her talk about her parents. I figured since they weren't here, playing their song could be sort of…I dunno. An homage, I guess."

He twirled her slowly, securing his arm around her waist as he drew her back to him with a smile.

Desi swallowed. Her heart stuttered in her chest as Sirius looked down at her. He drew her arm up, wrapping her fingers around the back of his neck and pulled her even closer, lowering his mouth toward hers.

"Sirius…" Desi protested, looking away.

He straightened, nodding once and pulling her back into a gentle swaying dance. His gaze settled over her head, staying on James and Lily as they danced and laughed and kissed. He watched them serenely with the ghost of smile playing around his lips.

"I'm sorry, you know," Sirius said, pulling his eyes away from the happy couple and settling them on Desi.

"It is ok, Sirius. I—"

"Let me finish," he interrupted quietly, twirling her again. As she settled back into his arms, he continued. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I thought it for the best. We fought…it seems like we argued so much."

Desi smiled. "We do argue an awful lot," she said. "We're fairly good at it, in my opinion."

"I miss it. Do you miss it? I miss it," he said quickly, looking around the dance floor.

"Do you?" Desi asked, her throat suddenly dry. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears as she watched his face when he slid his hands to her hips and took a step back, putting some space between them.

"Dizzy love, I miss all of it. The laughing and yelling, the fighting and the shagging. Especially the shagging," he said, smiling as Desi laughed loudly. "I miss you, Des. So much. I'm sorry I was an ass."

"I forgive you for being an ass, Sirius. It's surely habit by now."

Sirius smiled. "Will you come home? The place isn't the same without you."

"I…I have to think about it," Desi said. Sirius nodded understandingly. "Ok. Yes," she said as the dance ended. "I didn't say I had to think about it _long_."

"So…yes?"

"Yes."

Sirius whooped and picked her up and wrapped his arms around her waist, spinning her in a circle. Desi laughed and hugged his neck, bringing her mouth to his. Sirius set her on her feet, sliding her down the length of his body as he did so. Desi placed her fingertips on his cheeks, deepening their kiss.

They separated at the sound of applause. Desi blushed as everyone in the room clapped and smiled at them. Sirius gave a small wave. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head, ushering her away from the dance floor.

James and Lily met them at a table.

"So I take it everything's worked out then," James said, slapping Sirius on the back. "You had me worried, mate."

Sirius scoffed. "I knew before I asked that she'd agree to come home. That's why I had Peter and Remus go and transport her things from her flat."

"You did not," Desi said disbelievingly.

"I did," Sirius said, grinning broadly.

"Of all the arrogant, self—"

Sirius stopped her tirade with a laugh and a kiss. Desi clung to his neck, smiling against his mouth.

"Picture!"

Lily bumped Desi with her elbow and she pulled herself away from Sirius. She stood at his side as he stood next to James and Lily. The bulb from the camera blinded her for a second as the photographer snapped the picture.

"Hey!" Lily called to the band, grabbing James's hand. "Let's start this party, eh?"

As the band kicked into the rocking anthem _Hot Cauldron, Cold Heart, _the guests hooted and began dancing animatedly.

"Let's go home," Desi said.

Sirius grinned and gripped her hand, leading her toward the exit. He whistled between his teeth, drawing James's attention over the sound of the band. He jerked his head toward the door.

James leaned down and whispered something to Lily. She looked at them over her shoulder and waved, smiling knowingly.

Desi barely managed to wave back before Sirius took her Side-Along. Caught unprepared by the sensation of Apparition, she stumbled as they appeared in the kitchen of their house.

Sirius caught her by the shoulders and immediately closed the distance between them, bringing his mouth to hers. "I missed you," he said against her lips. "Bloody hell, I missed you."

Desi wrapped her arms around his neck and drew herself up against him, kissing him back with equal fervor. Sirius gripped her hips and backed her against the counter. Desi grunted as the countertop hit the base of her spine. Sirius muttered an apology but continued kissing her. She shimmied up to sit on the counter, wrapping her legs around his hips and burying her fingers in his hair.

Sirius pulled away when Desi giggled.

"What?" he asked.

"I'm sorry," she chuckled, licking her bottom lip. "That bloody mustache tickles."

Sirius smiled and twitched his lip. "It's staying," he said determinedly.

"I figured as much," Desi said, curling her fingers around his neck. She gave him a quick kiss on the lips and slid from the counter, stepping around him with a saucy grin.

"Where are you going?" he asked. "I wasn't quite done here."

"Well, I should hope not," she replied, stepping through the kitchen door and into the hall. Sirius's eyebrows shot skyward as he saw a bundle of material fly past the door.

"Was that…"

"My dress," Desi called in answer.

Sirius listened as the heels of her shoes clicked on the hardwood floor. He heard the clatter of a shoe as she took it off and dropped it in the hallway. A heartbeat later, he heard the second one hit the floor.

Desi stuck her head and shoulders back in the door. "Am I doing this by myself, or what?" she teased, disappearing again.

Sirius grinned and hurried from the kitchen, unbuttoning his shirt as he went. He chased Desi upstairs and into her room, the sound of her laughter radiating through the house as he caught her and tumbled both of them to the bed.


	6. Chapter 6

October 27, 1979

Sirius leaned against the doorjamb in Desi's classroom and waited for her to notice him. He watched her with a small smile as she leaned over to help a young Muggle boy around nine years old with his schoolwork. He grinned, chuckling quietly as he saw the boy sneak a peek down Desi's blouse.

Desi looked up and tilted her head in question, smiling pleasantly. "Class, continue working. I'll be right outside the door, so no goofing about. Jordan, that means you."

A skinny blonde boy pushed his glasses up on his nose and smiled mischievously.

"What are you doing here?" Desi asked quietly, ushering Sirius into the hall. He kissed her, a quick peck on the lips, and Desi laughed. "Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sirius assured her. "I just wanted to say goodbye before we went off."

"What?" Desi said, sinking against the wall. "You're going on a mission?"

"Dumbledore called us in this morning. It's pretty urgent, from the sound of things."

"Who all is in your unit?"

"Peter, James, Lily, and myself. There's three units going, but Frank and Alice are on 'official' Ministry business so they couldn't make it. Molly's off active duty unless it is something unavoidable, 'cause of the kids. Remus is close to having his…furry little problem," he said, lowering his voice as another teacher passed them. "And Dumbledore is too pleased with your position to pull you."

Desi rolled her eyes. "It's so bloody _boring_," she said with a wry grin. "I'd go mad if I was stuck solely with Muggles."

Sirius chuckled and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. He checked the hall, making sure none of her supervisors were around before he kissed her. He smiled as she sighed. Kissing the tip of her nose, he straightened.

"I'll see ya's," he said. "We'll be back before you know it."

"Be careful," she said, squeezing his hand.

Sirius tossed his hair and grinned. "Yes ma'am," he said, saluting. He kissed her again before stepping away. "Oh," he said, snapping his fingers. "And watch out for the little bugger in the blue jumper."

"Roland? Why?" Desi asked.

"He was admiring your blouse," Sirius said, winking. "Not that I blame him. I'm rather fond of it myself," he added, stroking his goatee thoughtfully.

Desi looked down and tsked, reaching up to pull the material back on her shoulders, raising the scoop neckline. "Better?"

"For the boy, yes," Sirius said. He wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her head. "Take care."

"You too," she whispered. She watched him walk away and duck into a janitor's closet, sighing when she heard the muffled _crack!_ of his Disapparation.

* * *

Desi frowned as someone rang her doorbell. She grunted, not wanting to leave the nest she had made on her soft bed. The bell rang again. She sighed and let the little wooden figurine she was playing with drop back to the table over which she had been making it hover.

She trudged down the stairs, tying the belt on her striped robe as the heels of her fuzzy slippers slapped sharply with every step. She pulled the door open and turned to shuffle to the kitchen, letting Remus close it as he came in behind her.

"What're you up to this late at night?" Desi asked. "There's only a couple days yet before your cycle. You should be resting." She looked at him, noting his pallor and disheveled appearance. His dark blonde hair was shaggy and dark circles smudged the area beneath his eyes. She turned and filled the teakettle.

"I was out for a walk," Remus answered. He ran a hand through his hair. "I haven't been sleeping much."

"Is that normal?" Desi asked. He laughed humorlessly.

"What's this 'normal' of which you speak?"

She smiled and patted his arm. He covered her hand with his, squeezing lightly.

"So what are you doing up?" he asked. "I saw your light on. That's the only reason I rang."

"I couldn't sleep either," she said with a small shrug. "I dunno. I…I've just got a bad feeling."

"You're probably just anxious about Sirius's mission," Remus reasoned, but Desi shook her head.

"That's not it," she said. "It's different. This feels…bigger. Worse. Like something horrible is in the works, but I can't do anything about it."

"Des, we all feel like that. Nobody knows what's gonna—"

"No," she insisted. "Remus, I don't mean in the grand scheme of things. I mean something close. Personal. But it's not happening now. This is more of a sense of…I dunno. Foreboding, I guess."

"I thought you believed Divination to be—what was it? 'A foolish guessing game used by people who have no real skills'. I'm almost positive that's what you said on more than one occasion."

"I'm not talking about Divination," Desi said, sighing touchily. "I mean, I guess I am, but it isn't as if I took a look at my teacup, you know?"

Remus could see how bothered she truly was, so he sat at the table. "I'm listening."

Desi hopped onto the counter and lightly kicked her feet. "I dreamt a dream the other night."

When she didn't continue, Remus raised his eyebrows. "About?"

"We were all dead," Desi said, clearing her throat when her voice trembled.

The dream had left her shaken. She had awakened deep in confusion, unsure of where the dream stopped and reality began. It wasn't until she had showered the next morning that she had finally shaken the last vestiges and gotten her mind straight.

"It was just a dream, Des," Remus said quietly. "You've been under a lot of stress. I promise you, we aren't dead."

"I know that," Desi said heatedly. "I'm not a fool, Remus. But you didn't see…it wasn't like a usual dream."

"Well then tell me about it. Tell me what made it different," he said, standing and crossing to the stove to take off the kettle.

"That's not—"

The teakettle began whistling, interrupting Desi's sentence. Remus smiled.

"Superior hearing. Interesting advantage to being close to a full moon," he said. "Now, the dream?"

Desi took a deep breath and accepted the cup he held out to her.

"It was dark," she began. "Everything had a sort of blue tint. It made everyone's skin look ghostly white. I was in a room I had never seen before, with high arches and stone walls." Her voice took on a faraway quality.

"That's when I saw you," she continued. "You were older looking; lying next to a girl…I don't know who it was. There were loads of other bodies around, but yours was the only face I knew. I started running, looking for someone—anyone. I pushed through a door and saw Peter. A great snake was crawling over him, winding 'round his legs. I turned and ran again, the other direction. I came to an open room, like the dining hall at Hogwarts, only there were no tables." She took a sip of tea, hoping Remus didn't see the slight tremor in her hand as she sat the cup on the counter. "I walked into the room and the door slammed behind me. I looked around for a way out, but the only other opening was a window at the far end of the hall with a tattered curtain. Suddenly, Sirius appeared. I called out to him, but he turned away as if I hadn't spoken. I called for him to stop, to wait, but he looked over his shoulder and grinned, and then started running for the window. He leapt through the fluttering drape. I ran after him, but when I got to the window there was only brick behind the curtain. He was gone."

"Desi," Remus said quietly, leaning against the counter.

"I'm not done," she said, shaking her head. "I was so drained by this time that I just slid to the floor. I don't know how long I stayed like that, curled up against the wall, but when I opened my eyes, the room had shifted. It was still dark, but instead of glowing blue, everything was…kind of green. I pushed myself to my feet and started forward, stopping when I saw a body slumped against the wall. As I crossed to it, I stepped on a pair of glasses. I knew then who I was looking at. I knelt beside James and looked around for any sign of Lily. That's when I heard it."

"Heard what, love?" Remus asked, concerned.

Desi looked at him and struggled to keep her voice strong. "Voldemort's laughter."

Remus paled even more than he already was and made a strangled sound in his throat.

"I followed it, the high pitched keening of his laugh. I followed the sound to a small white room. Lily was there, holding…something. I don't know what it was. A light of some kind. She was protecting it from Voldemort. He told her to stand aside, as if she was simply blocking his path on the sidewalk. Then there was a blinding flash of light and a scream…and that's when I woke up."

"Desi," Remus said after a long moment. "Have you told anyone about this dream? Dumbledore, McGonagall…anyone?"

She shook her head. "I didn't want anyone to think I was crazy. Or to look at me like you are now."

"How am I looking at you?"

"As if you can't decide if I'm the harbinger of doom or a complete nutter."

"I don't think you are either of those things, Desi. I just think…hell, I don't know _what_ to think. You don't claim to delve in Divination, but this dream is much more intense than a normal dream."

"You said yourself, normal isn't exactly a daily occurrence," Desi said, slipping from the counter and setting their teacups in the sink. She sighed and looked at her friend. "Remus, tell me straight. Do you think that this dream could be in any way a premonition?"

"I just don't know, Des. This isn't really my area. I do know that you are an exceptional witch and I think you should talk to Dumbledore, in case—"

"I don't want to talk to Dumbledore," Desi interrupted. "I want to know what you think. Should I just put it out of my head for now?"

Remus sighed. "Have you ever had any of your dreams come true?"

Desi shook her head and picked at her fingertips. "No," she said quietly.

"Well, my suggestion—and it is only _one_ suggestion, mind you—is that you keep you eyes open for visual cues. If you find any situation that brings about déjà vu, you tell someone immediately. And," he added, "_talk to Dumbledore_."

"I'm not bothering Dumbledore with this," Desi said. "And I don't want you to either. Promise, Moony. This is my business."

Remus hesitated. "You should at least tell Sirius."

Desi scoffed. "Right. Because _he'd_ obey my wishes. He'd go to Dumbledore straight away, even if I asked him not to."

"Alright," Remus said, groaning. "Alright, fine. I'll keep quiet for now. For now," he reiterated. "But if anything starts triggering—"

"Believe me, if any situation arises that coincides with that dream, I'll let all of you know immediately. I would try to keep you safe."

Remus and Desi both jolted at the sound of someone Apparating into the bedroom upstairs.

"Des?"

"Sirius!" Desi said happily, smiling at Remus. She heard his footfalls on the stairs and met him in the hallway, wrapping her arms around him and hugging him fiercely.

All of the tension and fear that had been weighing her down moments before melted as his arms encircled her.

He pulled away and kissed her on the forehead. She winced as she caught a look at his face. A large gash stretched across his right cheek. He had a black eye and his lower lip was slightly swollen.

"Lovely face," she murmured, lightly brushing her fingertips over a bruise on his chin.

He nodded once, his eyes somber. He looked over her shoulder and lifted a hand to Remus.

"Moony."

"Padfoot. How was the mission?"

"Our intel was faulty. We walked into an ambush. We were pinned down for four days and lost three good wizards on top of it."

"Who?"

"Selene Argeneau and Henry Carlisle both took hits with the Killing Curse. Caradoc Dearborn went missing the second night while he was on watch. Fabian thinks he defected—"

"Fabian thinks everyone is going to defect," Desi muttered.

"The rest of us figure he was taken back to the Death Eater camp. I don't imagine we'll recover anything from him. The Death Eaters…they were more in-sync than usual. They weren't just focused on the physical attack, they tried to get in our heads—blasting photos of Edgar Bone's family into our corner, saying horrible things—plans for Lily and the other witches…they've really upped their game."

Desi looked at him intently. Something else had occurred during the mission. She could see it in his eyes.

"What is it, love?" she asked, brushing her thumb over his cheek. "What's happened?"

Sirius was silent, broody. Remus recognized the look and took the opportunity to take his leave.

"I'll leave you two to it, then," he said. "I expect you have a lot to talk about," he said pointedly, looking at Desi. She frowned and went to the sink, busying herself with rinsing the teacups.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Remus said, patting Sirius on the shoulder.

"See ya, mate," Sirius called absently, sitting at the table.

Desi dried her hands and went to stand beside him. "What's going on in that head of yours?" she asked, tipping his chin up so that he would look at her. "What did they say to you?"

Sirius ran a hand through his wavy hair and sighed.

"Regulus is dead," he said evenly.

"Sirius…" she whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder. He shrugged lightly and shook his head. "What happened?"

"He betrayed Voldemort. He tried to get out of being a Death Eater. He was a fool to think he could just leave," he said dismissively. Desi saw through his tough act immediately.

"Don't blame yourself for this, Sirius," she said quietly. "Don't. You said too many times that there was nothing to be done for Regulus."

"But you always insisted that there was," Sirius reminded her with a sad smile. "The truth of it is that I hated him for his devotion to the family. I'm not so blind as to think that he was a good-hearted boy," he said. "But the fact is, he was barely more than a child when he joined Voldemort's ranks. And I just let him go."

"He was only a year younger than us, Sirius," Desi reminded him. She sat across from him and took his hands in hers. "I've never thought Regulus was all bad, love. You know that. But becoming a Death Eater wasn't my choice and it wasn't your choice. It was his. He chose to fight at Voldemort's side."

"Why would he wait until this late in the day to panic and try to run?" Sirius asked. "What could have spooked him so badly that he would face those consequences?"

"I don't know," Desi said. "I'm sure we'll see soon enough," she added, closing her eyes briefly.

"He was in over his head," Sirius said quietly, his voice full of disdain. "He was so eager for their approval—to be the darling little prince. I wonder…will they even mourn him, the boy they were so proud of? No," he answered himself, shaking his head. He looked at Desi and smiled coldly, his voice acidic. "There is no room for cowardice in the ancient and most noble house of Black."

He looked away from her quickly, clenching his jaw against the flood of bitterness and sorrow. Desi stood and led him to the sofa in the living room. She sat on the end and gently pulled him down next to her, cradling his head in her lap. Her fingertips idly played with the ends of his hair.

Knowing that he would deal with things in his own time and way, she did not make mention of the tears that trickled onto her thigh. She placed one hand on his shoulder. Her heart broke for him; she felt the tremble in his shoulders beneath her hand as he silently cried for the young, misguided stranger who had shared his family name.


	7. Chapter 7

July 30, 1980

"Hurry _up_, Dizzy!" Sirius called, holding his hand out for Desi to grab as they ran down the long white hallway.

Desi laughed and gripped his fingers, calling out an apology when she bumped into a nurse as Sirius dragged her into the lift.

"Come on, come on, come on," he muttered, tapping the button for their floor impatiently.

"Calm down, Sirius," Desi said, laughing at him. "I doubt they'll be done by the time you get there."

"This is mad," Sirius said. "Absolutely mad. I can't believe it. Moony!"

Desi stepped aside as the elevator door opened and Sirius rushed forward to greet Remus. He braced a hand against Peter's shoulder as he battered Remus with questions.

"Sirius. Sirius," Remus said. "Calm down, mate. They just took Lily back to her room. Come on. I'll show you." He started down the hall, waving them forward. They saw James coming up the hall with a small bucket. He smiled at them, but Desi noticed he looked a bit pale.

"Come on, then," he said, wrapping an arm Sirius's neck and putting him in a headlock. "You can come in, if she'll have you," he said, rounding a corner. "She's a bit…overwhelmed at the moment."

"I'm going to go," Peter said, looking around nervously. "Hospitals…they kind of give me the creeps, you understand. Give Lily my best."

Desi nodded as she linked hands with Sirius.

"I'll walk you down," Remus said. He winked at Desi. "Take care and don't let Sirius hyperventilate," he said. "I'll be back later."

"This is insane," James was saying. He gripped Sirius's jacket and shoved him forward excitedly.

"I can't believe you're going to be a father," Desi said.

James stopped in his tracks and the smile slid from his face. "I'm going to be a father," he repeated. Desi grimaced as a look of sheer panic raced across his features. "Holy _shit_, Padfoot. I'm going to be a bloody _father_!"

"It shouldn't be something that snuck up on you, mate. I mean, surely you've noticed Lily has—"

"Lily has _what_?" Lily asked, waddling from her hospital room and glaring at Sirius, daring him to finish his thought.

"Lily has blossomed," he finished, offering his most charming smile.

Her eyes narrowed but she switched her gaze to James. "You gonna just hold that ice 'til it melts, or are you going to give some to your 'blossomed' wife?" she asked.

James stared blankly as if he'd never laid eyes on her before. Desi took pity on him and took the bucket, bringing it to Lily.

"I think you look beautiful," she said.

Lily scoffed, but smiled. "Yeah, well, I can't wait 'til it's you going through this. I don't know how men manage to ignore this belly for nine months. Look at him," she said, inclining her chin to James as he slid into a chair. His eyes still stared straight ahead glassily. "It's only just hit him, the poor man. He'll be a zombie for at least an hour."

"Have you heard from Frank? Molly said they took Alice in to delivery just before midnight."

"I haven't, but I've been a bit preoccupied." Lily smiled and popped an ice cube into her mouth. She gasped and placed a hand on either side of her stomach, swearing through her clenched teeth.

"Is that normal?" Sirius asked, rushing over. "Lily, love, come and sit."

"I don't want to bloody sit," Lily growled. "I want this baby to come out. _Now_."

"I'm afraid it doesn't work like that, dearest," Sirius said soothingly. "You just have to be patient—"

"Patient?" Lily demanded. "I've been nothing but patient for nine months. He's the one just taking his own sweet time about it. This child has James's personality," she complained.

Sirius smiled, but caught Desi's warning grimace and stifled it.

"Here, Lil," Desi said, ushering Lily to the bed. "Have a sit down. I'm sure they'll come put you in delivery in no time."

"Where is James?" Lily asked. "Sirius, go and get him. He's not getting off that easy." She cried out as another contraction tore through her.

"Oi, we need a nurse," Sirius called to a passing doctor. "James, you better get in here, mate."

James looked startled but entered the room, replacing Desi at Lily's side.

"That's _it_," she hissed, breathing through the pain. "You're never gonna touch me again, you bastard. You might as well pack your evil penis in a box and hide it in a closet. Never again, do you hear me?" she demanded.

"Yes," James said. "Never again, love. Never again," he promised. "Just breathe, Lily."

"I'm breathing, you prat," Lily said, groaning as the contraction subsided. "She lay back against her pillows. "Sweet Lord," she sighed, giving James's hand a slight squeeze. She looked up at him with love in her eyes...now that the pain had settled. "They never mention this part in the fairytales, do they? It always skips from the wedding to the happily ever after."

"If they included this part, no woman in her right mind would marry the handsome prince," Sirius said, giving Lily a pat.

A nurse entered the room and checked her vitals. "Delivery is prepped and ready. Mr. Potter, if you'll follow me," she said, wheeling Lily's bed out of the room. "The two of you are free to wait in the room down the hall. We won't be but a minute."

"G'luck, Lil!" Sirius called.

"Love you! You'll both be fine," Desi said, giving James a reassuring squeeze. She joined Sirius in the waiting area and leaned her head on his shoulder, linking her fingers with his.

"Poor James," Sirius said. "He's a right mess."

"He is definitely frazzled. I'm sure you'll tease him mercilessly about it, once everything has settled," Desi predicted with a grin.

"Can't do that," Sirius said. Desi lifted her face and looked at him questioningly. "Well, what's gonna happen when it's me in there?" Sirius asked. "If I torture poor James over his rattled nerves, he'd never help me out when it's your turn to pop out a baby."

Desi laughed. "Sirius Black, you are awfully presumptuous. Who said I want you to be the father of my children?" she teased.

"You do, every time we—"

"There you are!" Remus said, plopping in a chair next to Sirius. "What'd you do to Des?" he asked lightly, catching sight of Desi's scarlet cheeks.

"Oh, nothing," Sirius said, grinning. "She's just excited 'bout the baby, I s'pose," he said, winking at her.

* * *

"There's the Longbottom boy," Remus said, pointing to the baby behind the glass. "Neville, Frank said."

"He looks a bit like a toad, dunnee?" Sirius asked, tilting his head to the side in  
examination. Desi punched his arm.

"He's precious," she said, leaning forward and lightly tapping the glass. "Hello, baby," she cooed.

"Doesn't this whole viewing room put you in mind of a fish tank?" Sirius asked, looking around. "What?" he asked when Remus and Desi looked at him. "You even tapped the glass like the baby was gonna do a trick."

Desi laughed and shook her head, turning her attention to the nursery. "Look, look! There they are with Harry!"

Sirius pressed forward, gripping Desi's shoulders and peering over her head, grinning like a fool as he spied his godson for the first time. "Oh, wow..." he breathed as the nurse held the baby up for them to see. "Des, he's bloody brilliant," he said, giving her shoulders a squeeze.

"Wonder where James has got to?" Remus asked, smiling at the baby.

"Passed out on the delivery room floor, last I heard." Remus, Desi, and Sirius turned at the sound of Frank Longbottom's voice. "Near pulled a spell myself," he admitted with a grin, slapping Remus on the back.

"Congratulations, Frank," Desi said, smiling. "He's a lovely boy."

"Looks a bit like Alice's mum, bless him, but he'll do in a pinch I suppose," he teased with a wink.

"How is Alice?" Sirius asked, still eyeing baby Harry with a lopsided grin.

"She's resting, but overall good," Frank said. "I slipped out for a smoke and thought I'd come check on the new Potter. He's got the look of James, doesn't he?"

"He's a good blend, I think," Desi said. She looked up at Sirius and her heart melted at the look in his eyes as he watched the baby. If such tenderness surfaced at the birth of his godson, what would happen when it was his own child? She smiled at the thought. They had never really discussed marriage and children, but perhaps they should.

James came out a little while later, looking pale but happy. Desi left the men to their celebrations and went in to sit with Lily.

"Heya, mum," she said, smiling at her friend.

"Heya, godmum," Lily replied, practically glowing. "Did you see him? Oh, Des...he's beautiful."

"He is," Desi agreed with a nod, giving Lily's hand a squeeze. "He'll be a looker just like his dad, but with the moral sensibilities of his mom, of course," she said, grinning.

"Of course," Lily agreed. She laughed. "And with you and Sirius helping in his raising, no doubt he'll be a right little mastermind by the time he's four."

"No doubt about that," Desi said. She bent and kissed Lily on the cheek. "I'm gonna sit here, but you go on and get some rest. I imagine you must be a bit tired."

"Nah," Lily said sarcastically. "It was a walk in the park."

Desi grinned again and sat in a cushioned chair next to the bed. The next thing she knew, Sirius was shaking her awake. She sat up with a start, but Sirius put a finger to his lips. She looked over and saw that Lily was sleeping peacefully.

"You look knackered," Sirius whispered. "Let's go home, love. James can take over your spot," he said with a smile.

Desi nodded and stood, stretching, before kissing James on the cheek and telling him congratulations again. "We'll see you all in the morning," she whispered. "Give little Harry a smooch for me."

"Will do," James said, saluting her.

Desi took Sirius's hand and walked beside him to the lift. "Where's Remus?" she asked.

"He left a little while ago," Sirius said. "You've been in with Lily for nearly three hours."

"Oh, I hadn't realized," Desi said on a yawn. Sirius wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close, kissing her head.

"You missed baby holding time," he said.

"You got to hold him?" Desi asked. "I would have loved to see that," she said thoughtfully.

"I happen to be great with babies, thanks very much," Sirius said.

"Oh, please! Name three babies you have ever known," Desi challenged with a laugh.

"Well...there's...Neville. And Harry..."

"Ones born today do not count. I win," Desi said, snuggling into his side as they stepped out of the hospital. "Besides, when I said I would have loved to see you holding baby Harry, love, it was because everyone knows that there is nothing sexier in this world than an attractive man holding a baby. It's a well-known fact among women. Something to do with appealing to our nurturing side."

"Really?" Sirius asked. "We can go back up. I'll hold Harry again. And the Longbottom boy," he teased. "Hell, I'll juggle the lot of 'em for you."

Desi laughed. "That won't be necessary, Mr. Black," she said. "But it would be nice if we could hurry home and you could hold me instead."

Sirius chuckled and turned her into his chest, wrapping his arms firmly around her and pulling her close. He bent his head and kissed her, disapparating with a pop.


	8. Chapter 8

_**December 24, 1980**_

"No, no, Harry," Desi said gently, taking the Christmas ornament away from the baby. "Sirius, we've a crawling baby here," she reminded him as he tangled with a string of large multicolored lights. "You have to make sure the ornaments are out of reach."

"Excuse me, Dizzy," Sirius said. "I was a bit busy fighting with these blasted lights. This is ridiculous!" he exclaimed, dropping the strand and pulling his wand from his back pocket. "_Derigo_!" he said, smiling when the lights untangled and straightened themselves out. He waved his wand and flicked it toward the Christmas tree. "_Decoro_!"

Harry laughed and watched as the Christmas tree decorated itself. He squealed happily as Sirius bent and scooped him up.

"Lazy," Desi said with a grin, gliding into the den with a tray of cookies.

Sirius gave her a dazzling smile and winked. "Now there's more time to prepare for the Weasley invasion," he said, bouncing Harry in his arms. "How'd we get roped into babysitting for all of our breeder friends?" he asked, making a face at the baby.

"Because it's loads cheaper to baby-sit for a few hours than to buy Christmas presents for everyone," Desi said. "It won't be too bad," she assured him. "William and Charlie are ten and eight, so they're old enough not to be much of a bother. I'll watch Percy, Ron, and Harry. They're too small to mind anything at all."

"But you're forgetting the Terrible Twos," Sirius reminded her.

"Oh, no I'm not," she said with a laugh. "I'll take care of the others. You can be in charge of wrangling the twins."

"It wouldn't take long and I'd be _strangling_ the twins," Sirius teased, passing the baby to her.

"What about the Longbottom?" Sirius asked. "Is Frank and Alice dropping him off as well?"

"No," Desi said, sitting Harry on the floor and passing him a soft teacake. "I think Frank's mother is keeping him."

Sirius snorted. "Why'd they leave the poor lad with that old hag?" he asked.

"Don't sugar coat, love," Desi said wryly. "How do you really feel?"

Sirius smiled and stepped over Harry to bend and kiss Desi. The baby cooed and laughed at their affection.

"Do you wanna know how I really feel?" Sirius asked, staring into her eyes. His eyes danced, the blue irises alight with mischief and adoration.

"Please keep in mind that there are little eyes and ears paying attention to you," Desi kidded quietly, unable to look away from his sparkling gaze.

"Nevermind Harry," Sirius said, squatting down in front of the sofa and taking Desi's hands in his. "He knows what's what. Don't you, lad?" he asked, glancing back at the baby. Harry smiled at Sirius's attention, looking back at Desi when his godfather did. "Des, I was wondering...I mean, I was thinking that...ah, bloody hell," Sirius muttered, clearing his throat. "Do you...I mean, would you maybe want to—"

The doorbell chimed in rapid succession, alerting them to the arrival of the Weasley children.

"What were you asking?" Desi asked, squeezing Sirius's hand. He smiled crookedly and raised his eyebrows as he shrugged.

"It'll hold off a bit," he said, tugging her to her feet. "I'll go and set the juice out."

Desi stood and scooped Harry into her arms. "What was he gonna ask, little one?" she whispered. Harry smiled at her and drooled.

"Des, love, go and let those demons in," Sirius called from the kitchen.

"It really won't be that bad," she called, pulling open the door with a smile.

* * *

She had underestimated the destructive force of the Weasley children.

"Merlin's beard," she sighed, closing the door after Arthur. She grimaced as she glanced at her den. "They aren't bad kids," she said. "It's just that there are so many of them."

"You did make sure Arthur got them all, yeah?" Sirius asked, plopping onto the sofa. He draped an arm across his eyes. "I'd hate to find one stuffed somewhere later on."

"He got them all," Desi said, sitting next to him and leaning over, dropping her head on his leg. She bolted upright immediately. "Omigod, where's Harry?!"

"Relax, Des," Sirius said. "He's by the tree. He konked out about an hour ago."

"How?" she wondered, looking over at the sleeping baby. His diaper-clad bottom stuck up in the air, but he was sleeping peacefully. Desi lay her head back down.

"When's James and Lily supposed to pick him up?" Sirius asked, yawning.

"That'll be them," Desi said as the doorbell rang. She answered it with a smile, jerking a thumb toward the tree. "He's over there."

"We passed Arthur and Molly on the way in," James said. "You had a house full tonight, eh? How's it, Sirius?"

Sirius lifted one hand, flashing a quick thumbs up, before dropping his arm back to the sofa. James laughed and crossed to the sleeping baby, gently lifting him from the carpet.

"I can carry his bag out for you," Desi offered.

"Thanks," James whispered. "Night, Padfoot," he called quietly.

"Night, mate," Sirius said.

As they approached the car, Lily rolled down her window. "Did he give you any trouble at all?"

"Of course not," Desi said. "He's a right angel, that one."

"Did Sirius survive the twins?" she asked, arching a brow.

"Are you kidding?" Desi replied, laughing. "They were like peas in a pod. He rolled around on the floor with them for most of the night. Charlie and Bill—he informed me tonight that he didn't like being called William," she explained before continuing. "They both ran around and played dragons with each other. The only problem I had at all was Percy, the middle one, cried a bit when Arthur dropped them off. But after a while I stuffed a cookie in his face and he was right as rain."

"It was nice of you to offer to keep the kids," Lily said as James got in and shut his door. "You're still coming for dinner tomorrow, right?" she asked.

"Wouldn't miss it," Desi said.

"Good. See you then!" Lily called, waving as the car pulled away.

By the time Desi went back inside, Sirius had cleaned up the den and turned out the lights. The multicolored Christmas lights illuminated the room in a warm glow. Desi looked at the tree and smiled. Christmastime for her was always joyous and melancholy at the same time. She sighed and slipped her jumper over her head, turning for the stairs and bumping into Sirius.

"Oh!" she yelped with a start. "I thought you'd already turned in," she said, seeing that he had changed into flannel pajama pants and a white t-shirt.

"No, not quite yet," he said, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing the side of her neck.

She heard a quiet tune, recognized Judy Garland's _Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas_. Smiling, she tilted her head to the side and leaned closer to Sirius. He slowly began to sway, leading her in an intimate dance to the soft music.

"I love you, Sirius Black," Desi said on a sigh.

Sirius smiled, his fingertips lightly stroking her lower back. "Likewise. Happy Christmas," he said, kissing her hair.

"We're supposed to go to James and Lily's for Christmas dinner," she said.

"Shh," Sirius whispered. "Just dance, Dizzy."

They danced. Even after the record ended, they held each other and continued to sway.

"Sirius?"

"Hmm?"

"What were you going to ask me earlier?"

Sirius chuckled. "You've a memory like an elephant," he said.

"It was five hours ago," she pointed out, giving his hip a light pinch.

He laughed. "Fine," he said, sighing dramatically. He stepped away from her and turned, rushing upstairs.

Desi stared blankly, scoffing in confusion. "Uh, hello?"

"Come on to bed, Dizzy!" Sirius called.

"You're supposed to be telling me what the bloody hell you were going to ask," Desi whined, punctuating each word with a stomp on a step. "It's gonna drive me crazy if you don't-"

Her sentence died as she pushed into their bedroom and spotted Sirius sitting on his knees in the middle of the bed. A small wooden box sat on the end of the bed in front of him.

"What's...?"

"Desdemona Keating," Sirius began, giving her one of his schoolboy smiles. "Would you do me the extreme honour and ultimate pleasure of becoming my wife?"

"What?" Desi said blankly. "Um...I think I need to sit," she said, slumping to sit on the edge of the hamper.

"I haven't even gotten to the good part," Sirius said, laughing. He stood and walked across the bed, picking up the little wooden box and jumping to the floor. He strode over to her with the confidence of his school days. He squatted down in front of her and opened the box, revealing an antique engagement ring. "See? It's shiny."

Desi would have laughed if she'd been able to make any sound at all. As it was, she just sat there with her mouth open and her eyes wide, staring at Sirius.

"I gotta tell you, love, you're making me a bit nervous," Sirius said with a chuckle.

He took her hand and sat the box in it, reaching up and placing a finger under her chin. Her mouth closed and Desi shook herself, moving her gaze from Sirius's face to the lovely, simple ring in her hand.

"You...you want to m-marry me?" she stuttered, looking back at him.

"Well sure," he said, tilting his head to the side. "I love you, idiot."

This time she did laugh, throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him close. Her laugh turned into a sob and Sirius pulled her back and looked into her eyes, cupping her face and wiping tears from her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

"What's this?" he said on a chuckle. "Oh, Dizzy, you are a confusing mess sometimes," he teased.

"Shut up," Desi snuffled with a smile. "I love you," she said.

"So am I to take the tears and such as a yes?"

"Yes," she said with a huge grin. "Yes, yes, yes!" She wrapped her arms around him again, squeezing tightly.

"Good," Sirius said, gathering her into his arms. He kissed her smartly on the mouth and smiled. "Good."


	9. Chapter 9

February 7, 1981

Death Eater activity had increased severely over the past few months and the underground was spread as thin as it could get. Dumbledore called for a meeting with the Order and reassigned a few of the members who had been working undercover. People who hadn't been seen in months were there, Peter Pettigrew among them. Many of the members decided to take a picture of the remaining Order, intending on boosting morale.

"I will take it, Ms. Keating," Dumbledore said as Desi took the camera. "Go and stand with your friends."

"Nonsense," Desi said. "Sir, there wouldn't be an Order without you. Get in there," she ordered with a smile. Dumbledore obliged and stood on the edge of the crew.

It was late in the afternoon before business was tied up and they were finally dismissed. James and Sirius went to catch Peter before he left. Desi approached Dumbledore with her hands in her pockets.

"Uh...d'you have a minute?"

Dumbledore smiled as he tucked a ledger into his desk. "Hopefully, I have several," he quipped.

She smiled and rocked back on her heels. "This might take a few of them," she said.

Dumbledore straightened and adjusted his spectacles. "What can I help you with, Ms. Keating?"

"Actually, sir, that's just it," she said. "See, I was wondering if you'd be willing to marry me today."

"I'm certain young Sirius would be rather angry if I did that," Dumbledore said pleasantly.

Desi laughed. "You know what I mean," she said.

"Indeed I do and may I just say, Desdemona, that it would be an honor to oversee your marriage ceremony," he said, taking her hand and giving it a pat.

"Great," Desi said with a giant smile. She craned her neck to see if Sirius was still in the office, but he had already left. "Um, I'll be right back," she said. "Don't go anywhere."

She walked briskly from the room. "Have you seen Sirius?" she asked Fabian Prewett.

"No, can't say as I have," he said. "Ask Gideon," he added, pointing to the far corner of the foyer.

Desi approached Gideon with the same urgent step. "Sirius?"

"Hit the loo," Gideon said with a jerk of his thumb. "You alright?"

She smiled and nodded before going down the hall to the men's room and sticking her head in the door. "Sirius?"

"Oi!" Remus said, huddling closer to the urinal. "Desi!"

"Is Sirius in here?" she asked, ignoring her friend's discomfort.

"He left a minute ago," Remus said. "Des, I'm begging...get out!"

"You're so bashful," she teased with an arched brow. She blew him a kiss and left the restroom, returning to the foyer. "Has anybody seen Sirius?" she called.

"In the loo," someone called.

"Upstairs," someone else said.

"No, I think he left with James."

"Oh, good grief," Desi muttered. She spied Lily coming from the office and held out her hands. "Have you seen Sirius?"

"He's in there talking to James," Lily said, jerking her thumb toward the office.

"Anybody else in there?"

"Just Dumbledore," Lily replied. "Peter's already gone. I'm sure you're just near tears at that news. What's—hey!"

Desi grabbed her wrist and hauled her back into the office, slamming the door in her haste. "I need you to be a witness."

"You aren't killing anybody, right?" Lily asked as she trailed behind her best friend. "'cause I've already told you I'm not testifying."

"You," Desi said, pointing at Sirius. She crooked her finger and gave him a come-hither smile. She nearly laughed when he actually looked over his shoulder and gave a 'who me?' look. "Come here!" she said with a grin, stamping her foot impatiently.

"You beckoned, madam?" he asked drolly as he crossed the room.

Desi took his hand and led him to Dumbledore's desk. Dumbledore looked up from his paper and smiled.

"Are we ready?"

"Yes," Desi said.

"Mr. Potter, I believe your presence is needed as well," Dumbledore said.

"What's going on here?" Sirius asked, confused. "Are you hijacking me into marriage?"

"It was your idea," she reminded him, wrapping her arm around his waist.

"Yeah, but don't you want to do the fluffy dress and the big brouhaha?"

Desi arched her brow again. "Am I honestly the fluffy dress type?"

Sirius's face split into a grin. "So...really? Here? Now?"

"You aren't knocked up, are you Diz?" James asked casually as he approached the desk. He grunted as Lily socked him in the stomach.

"Be nice," she chided.

"And no," Desi answered. She looked back at Sirius with adoration. "I'm just ready to start the next part of our lives."

Sirius draped an arm across her shoulders and turned his beaming smile to Dumbledore. "Let's do this, shall we?"

"Let's," Dumbledore agreed with a nod.

It took longer than they expected. Other people kept coming in and out of the office, interrupting the ceremony. Each new interrupter was more excited than the last, so obviously word about the marriage spread through the ranks. Remus was the fourth person to invade and he locked the door behind him, leaning against them with a smile. He waved Dumbledore on before crossing his arms and ankles, the picture of relaxation. Dumbledore rushed through the remainder of the ceremony. He placed Sirius's left hand on top of Desi's and touched the tip of his wand to their skin. Desi watched as a wispy silver thread wrapped around their hands before disappearing. In honor of Desi's upbringing, Dumbledore made a quick sign of the cross over the new couple and announced them to the witnesses as Mr. and Mrs. Sirius Black.

Lily wrapped Desi in a tight hug, crying happily. Remus left his post as doorkeeper and shook Sirius's hand before picking Desi up in a hug. He kissed her cheek and smiled.

"Congratulations," he said. "Didn't I tell you all those years ago that Sirius wasn't so bad?"

"Yes, you did," Desi said with a laugh, hugging him again.

"I'm happy for you, Des," he said. "Both of you," he added, ruffling Sirius's hair.

"You'll want to send an owl to your mum tonight," James said with a grin as Sirius went to shake Dumbledore's hand. "Let her know you married that miscreant."

"I suppose I'll find a telephone booth and give her a ring," she said. "I do wish she was here though. She'd love all of you...well, probably."

"Picture!" Lily chirped, holding up the camera. Remus took it from her and gave her a light shove toward Desi and James. "Where'd Sirius go?" she asked, looking over her shoulder for the groom.

"Here I am," he said, stepping in between James and his new wife. "Just had to make something."

"Make what?" Desi asked, wrapping an arm around his waist.

"Smile at the camera," Sirius said. Desi eyed him curiously before turning and waving at the camera. Her smile widened as Sirius leaned down and kissed her cheek. He pulled a piece of parchment out from behind his back and Desi leaned over to read it as Lily snapped the picture.

"Heya mum," Desi read, leaning back and laughing. The picture left the camera and Remus took it out, waving it dry as Desi pulled Sirius down for a long, merry kiss.

"Right," James said, clapping his hands together. "I think it's time for a drink. Who wants to celebrate?"

–

* * *

_Apparently, lots of people_, Desi thought later with a smile. Her house was full to bursting with laughing witches and wizards eager for a moment of joy. All three Potters, Remus, Alice and Frank, Arabella Figg, Minerva McGonagall, Dedalus Diggle, Molly and Arthur—even the Prewetts showed up. The Fire Whiskey flowed freely and as the night wore on, someone broke out the record player. Muggle records mixed with Wizard records until everyone was laughing and taking turns singing karaoke.

"'ey, 'o, let's go, shoot 'em in the back now! What they want, I dunno! They're all revved up and ready to go!" Lily sang drunkenly (and slightly off key), waving her pint in front of her.

Gideon and Fabian cheered from the sofa, laughing and lifting their glasses.

"Gideon, where is your shirt?" Desi yelled over the din of the party.

"Ah, it's here somewhere," Gideon replied carelessly. His brother punched his bare shoulder. Gideon looked at him for a moment before taking him in a headlock and rolling from the sofa.

"Don't break anything, you two," Molly called as she stepped up beside Desi. She patted Desi's back and smiled.

"Aren't you afraid you'll have a pair just like them one day?" Desi asked good-naturedly.

"One day?" Molly asked with a sarcastic chuckle. "Fred and George are more like those two everytime I turn around. No, fingers crossed this will be a darling angel," she said, rubbing her swollen belly. "And hopefully a girl."

Desi smiled. "Hopefully," she said as the Prewetts toppled a coffee table.

"Oi! That's enough," Molly said. "You two better cut it out before somebody lands a punch and it gets on for real."

Fabian crawled back over to the sofa, but Gideon stayed on the floor, gazing up at Desi with a crooked grin. "Sorry 'boutchur table," he said.

"No worries," Desi said, offering him a hand up. He draped an arm over her shoulders and swayed to the music. "Where's all the rest of your brood?" she asked Molly.

"At an aunt's house," Molly answered. "Though I'm afraid she'll never be the same after having them all at once," she added with a grin. She left Desi with Gideon and went to dance with her husband, as closely as her huge belly would allow.

Des jostled the drunk wizard, laughing when he attempted to applaud Lily without taking his arms from around her. She bobbed and swayed with him as the next song started, but finally managed to dislodge him onto another witch who had been eyeing his toned torso for a good bit of the night.

As the first fingers of dawn tinted the sky, Desi helped the last of the party guests steady himself enough to Disapparate home. She hoped for his sake that he could focus. The last thing she needed was for someone to blame her wedding reception on some sot splinching himself.

Desi eyed the mess that her house was in and ignored it. Cleaning could wait. She smiled and shook her head as she spread a small blanket over James and Lily, who were sleeping—or, more accurately, passed out—on the sofa. Little Harry was sleeping peacefully in the guest room upstairs, so his parents were ok where they were. Des headed for the kitchen and nearly pitched onto her face as she tripped over a leg sticking out from the hall closet.

"Gideon!" she hissed as she lightly kicked the unconscious man.

She chuckled and sighed, tossing a blanket over him as well. She debated on whether or not she should wake him and make him get on the other couch, but as he gave a quiet, drunken snore, she figured it obviously wasn't bothering him to sleep half in the closet. She was tired and ready to find her husband—she smiled to herself at the word—and get him into bed. She searched for him, quietly calling his name.

"He's upstairs, I think," Remus said on a yawn, coming up behind her. He dropped his chin onto her shoulder and sighed.

"I didn't know you were still here," she said, patting his hands as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"On my way out. You fellas sure know how to throw a party," he said sleepily, kissing her cheek.

Desi smiled. "Learned from the best," she said. "You boys could throw a mixer in the Room of Requirement that would rival one of Elton John's."

"Those were the days," Remus said, straightening and releasing her. He yawned again. "Right. I s'pose I'll be off then. I guess I could be charitable and volunteer to come help you clean later," he said, pulling on a newsboy cap. He looked around the kitchen with a grimace. "But I don't think I'm gonna."

"Wanker," Desi said with a laugh. She hugged her friend and bid him goodnight, walking him to the door.

She locked up and went upstairs, her feet screaming in protest with every step she took. She stopped and slipped her shoes off, carrying them by the strings the rest of the way up. She dropped them in the hallway and peeked in on Harry one more time before she went to bed. The sight before her melted her heart. Sirius lay on the bed, his dark hair messy and loose, with a sleeping Harry stretched over his chest. The baby's mouth was open as he slept, but even the squeak of the door didn't disturb him. Desi crossed the floor and gingerly brushed a hand over his head, kissing his cheek, before doing the same thing to her husband. She lightly brushed a stray lock of hair from his cheek and kissed his lips. Sirius stirred, inhaling deeply and kissing her back even as his arms came up to secure the slumbering baby.

"Hey," he mumbled with a sleepy, crooked grin as Desi pulled back.

"Hey yourself," she replied, stroking his hair. "Whatcha got there?"

"He was awake," Sirius said, cradling Harry as he sat up. The baby shifted in his sleep, resting his chubby cheek against Sirius's shoulder, before settling back in. "Not fussing, of course. Just up. Thought I'd pop in and say hi," he added with another grin.

"Face it," Desi said. "You're just a big ball of koosh when it comes to the boy."

Sirius chuckled and passed the baby to his wife. "I don't deny it," he admitted. "It's just 'cause he's a good lookin' kid," he said. "If he were ugly or funny looking, I wouldn't have anything to do with him."

"Uh-huh," Desi said. "You keep telling yourself that, love."

She carefully laid the baby in the crib, her lips curving as he sighed a deep, hearty sigh. She turned to her husband and tucked her hands in the back pockets of her jeans. "You look tired," she said gently.

"A bit, yeah," he agreed, running a hand through his hair as he stood. "Everyone gone?"

"James and Lily are on the sofa, and Gideon is in the closet," she said. She shrugged at his questioning look. "It's Gideon. What could I do?"

Sirius returned her shrug and smiled. "So, _Mrs. Black_," he said, slowly shuffling forward. "How would you like to spend our wedding night?"

Desi looked thoughtful. "Well, it isn't as if we've never made love, is it? I suppose we could just skip it tonight. You know, seeing as we're both so tired."

Sirius nodded. "It's true. I am beat. Plus, we've guests and we know how loud you get during—"

"Cheeky!" Desi said with a laugh, giving him a playful shove. "So sleep it is, then," she said, heading for the door. "I suppose it's true what they say. Once you're married, the sex life disappears."

"As illustrated by the Weasleys and their ninety children," Sirius said, following her into the hall. "Oi, Des?"

"Hmm?" she asked, turning and looking at him.

"Don't wake the baby," he said.

Before she could ask what he meant, he bent and charged her, draping her across his shoulder and running down the length of the hallway. She covered her mouth to keep from hooting with laughter, holding onto his shirt with one fist. As Sirius kicked their door shut, he smacked her playfully on the rump. Desi returned in kind before he slid her from his shoulder. Her feet had barely touched the floor before their mouths fused together.

Desi laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close, as he backed her toward the bed that they would now share as husband and wife.


	10. Chapter 10

**_September 16, 1981_**

"What's going on?"

Desi stuffed her wand in her back pocket and slung a medic bag over her shoulder, barely sparing a glance at the inquisitive witch. "Voldemort's been sighted with a troupe of Death Eaters. A squad was on site and sent for backup."

The young woman, new to the underground, hurried after Desi. "Is it true that the Longbottoms and Potters have survived the Dark Lord on two different occasions?" the girl asked.

"Three, assuming you count this one," Desi said, her stomach flipping nervously as she thought about Lily and James facing off with Voldemort again.

"Really? That's incredible," the girl breathed. "Were they the only wizards on site?"

"Gideon and Fabian Prewett were with them. Sirius Black made it to the scene first after that and came in for reinforcements." Desi looked at the young witch and stopped. "Stay here," she said. "Wait for orders."

"But I—"

"I don't have time to argue with you," Desi said sharply. "There are wounded wizards who need my help. You stay here until you get more experience in the field." With that, she rushed after the swarm of wizards and witches who were going downstairs so that they could Disapparate. "Arthur!" she called. "I didn't get the address. Take me Side-Along."

"Hurry up, now," Arthur said, waving her over. He gripped her arm firmly and counted down from three. Desi felt as if she was being squeezed through a tube of toothpaste and then she rematerialized behind a run-down barn. Before she could make a sound, Arthur put his finger to his lips.

They crept along behind the barn, the sounds of clashing spells ringing out in the crisp country night. Desi's eyes widened as she and Arthur emerged from the shadows. Everywhere she looked, spells of purple, yellow, red, and green were streaking across the open field. In the far corner of the meadow, a building burned.

"Down!"

Desi reacted instinctively, ducking at Arthur's shout. Behind her, turf and grass exploded and rained down on them.

"Go and help on the left flank," Arthur ordered, pointing. "I'll go and see to this lot," he added, jerking his head toward the right side of the fighters.

"Take care. You've finally got that baby girl to go home to," Desi said, slapping him on the back before ducking and creeping along some store buildings until she reached where the others were fighting. Dedalus Diggle sat with his back to a small stone wall. "Having fun, Diggs?" she asked, sliding in next to him and withdrawing her wand.

"Absolutely," he said, sarcasm clear in his voice.

"How many Death Eaters?"

"Started with five, I think. Lily took one before they took off for Voldemort," Diggle said. "Then the Prewetts took a couple and when Fabian took a hit, young Sirius rushed in and took out another one. After other wizards started arriving they piped in more and split into two factions," He patted her arm and waved toward where the wall curled around the corner of the barn. "You best take that bag of potions and powders over to that alcove, there," he said. "Fabian is in a bad way."

Desi nodded and crept along the wall, leaning against the side of the barn as she crawled into the alcove. Her breath caught as she saw the huge, bleeding gash that ran the length of Fabian's torso. "What kind of spell did this?"

"We don't know," Gideon said, sitting next to his brother. His voice shook with barely restrained emotion. Whether it was anger or sorrow, or a combination of both, Desi wasn't sure. "If your man hadn't help pull him back here, we'd all three be dead." He looked at Desi, his eyes grave. "Is there anything in that magic bag of yours to fix this?" he asked quietly.

Desi looked at the wound and back into the face of Gideon Prewett. "I'll do what I can," she said. It was all she could offer. Gideon clenched his jaw and drew his wand, crawling through the space and rejoining the fray with a haunting battle cry.

In the end, her efforts mattered little and she was forced to watch the light go out in Fabian's eyes. She emerged from the alcove and met Gideon's eyes. The anguish and fury she saw fueled her fighting spirit and she, too, joined the frontlines. She put aside thoughts of the people she loved: Sirius, Lily, James, Remus. She focused on the here and now, firing spell after spell at the Death Eaters hiding across the way. Her medic bag was passed down the line, aiding whomever it could.

The battle lasted long into the night. More buildings caught fire, casting the fighters in flickering light as the tongues of flame licked up the wooden walls. Smoke billowed, the soot sticking to sweaty skin.

When there were only two Death Eaters left, those few fighting for the Order circled them. One chose to fight to the death. The other, an older, thin man, chose to be taken into captivity.

"State your name, you piece of filth," Alastor Moody said, stabbing his wand under the Death Eater's chin.

"I am Antonin Dolohov," the man said. "I am Prime Death Eater of the Dark Lord Voldemort, and his servant until the end."

"Why don't you try going for that wand you've tucked in your cloak," Moody prodded, "and we'll hurry your end along."

Dolohov said something in Russian and Moody smiled savagely. "I'm sure that can be arranged for you in Azkaban," he growled, moving his wand. "_Petrificus totalis_!" he said, waving his wand. Dolohov fell to the ground, perfectly stiff, and no one even attempted to catch him.

"Have you seen Sirius?" Desi asked Moody as three wizards hefted Dolohov's petrified body and took him to the Ministry of Magic.

"I haven't," Moody said. "When you find him, tell him to find me in my office tomorrow. I've got a few questions for him."

"Any word on the Potters and the Longbottoms?" Desi asked as he passed.

He gave a sharp shake of his head and walked away. Desi nodded and moved on across the field, asking random witches and wizards if they had bumped into Sirius. Several people transporting the fallen and the wounded back to headquarters.

"Desi!"

Desi whirled at the sound of her name, relief flooding her as Lily rushed across the field. They met in a fierce hug, Lily's tearstained face pressing close to hers.

"Where's James?" Desi asked.

"He's gone. Back to base," Lily said. "He took Gideon's..."

"Gideon's dead?" Desi asked quietly when Lily's question stalled. She sighed when her friend nodded. "Arthur took Fabian as well," she said.

"It's going to be a hard time for Molly. For all of us," Lily said. "There are two more dead, not counting Fabian and Gideon, and so many wounded. Come on," she said, taking hold of Desi's hand. "We should get back."

Desi pulled away. "I can't," she said. "I have to find Sirius. Have you seen him?"

"Last I saw he was fighting over near the barn," Lily said as they turned to look at the building that was engulfed in flames. "He's probably at headquarters," she called as Desi ran the length of the wall. "Desi!"

Desi ignored her and kept looking. Fewer and fewer wizards remained on the field. She ran past the smoldering remains of a storage shed before stopping as she looked toward the blazing barn. There, emerging from the inferno and silhouetted against the flames, stumbled two figures. Exhaustion made her emotional and tears streamed down her face as she approached. Desi caught his cheeks in her hands and kissed him, sobbing in relief. The arm of the wounded witch Sirius helped was draped around his neck and he struggled under the hurt woman's weight.

"Des, take the girl," Sirius said, his voice strained. "Take her to headquarters."

"Are you hurt?" Desi asked as she looped the woman's arm around her neck.

"A scratch," Sirius said dismissively, trying for a smile. "I'll be along right after you. I just don't have the strength for a Side-Along. Go on, now," he said.

"You go first," Desi said. Sirius muttered under his breath but Disapparated almost immediately. Desi and the wounded witch followed.

When she had deposited the wounded witch on a stretcher, she went off in search of her husband again. She saw him standing in the corner, talking to Dumbledore. In the harsh light of the building, she could see how pale he was, even beneath the soot and dirt on his face.

"—think you should reconsider his appointment at Hogwart's," Sirius was saying. "You can't think it is just coincidence that such a large force turned out at the place."

"I do not believe it was coincidence," Dumbledore said, "but neither do I believe that one thing is connected to the other. Ah, Mrs. Black," he said, turning a small smile to Desi.

"I was just seeing if Sirius had gotten himself tended," she said apologetically. "I didn't mean to interrupt."

"It is no interruption," Dumbledore assured her. He frowned at Sirius. "You should have told me you were wounded, my boy," he said. "This conversation could have waited."

"It's just a scratch," Sirius said, blinking as the room spun. "I needed you to hear—"

"I heard every word," Dumbledore interrupted, waving his hand toward a chair. The chair slid over and caught Sirius as he fell.

"I wasn't finished," Sirius said, clenching his jaw against the pain in his side.

"Tomorrow, Sirius," Dumbledore said. "We have too much pain, both physical and otherwise, that we must deal with tonight. Find me tomorrow," he said again, nodding to Sirius and then Desi.

As soon as Dumbledore left, Desi knelt in front of Sirius and pushed his jacket aside. She swore as she saw the gash in his side, beneath his ribcage.

"Just a scratch?" she asked, astounded. "Bloody ignorant man," she muttered as she stood. Hooking his arm around her neck, she pulled him to his feet. "Why didn't you get this seen to before you lost so much blood?"

"There were important things to see to," Sirius replied weakly, grunting when Desi dipped and picked up one of the spare medic bags that had been piled in the foyer to tend to the wounded.

Desi kicked a door open and leaned Sirius against the wall as she swiped items from a desk before helping him sit. She pushed his jacket from his shoulders and let it drop to the floor before she began fumbling with the buttons of his waistcoat. Removing that as well, she gently pulled up his t-shirt.

"I knew you just wanted an excuse to get me naked," Sirius teased, his breath catching as the material stuck to the dried blood of his wound. He lifted his arms so Desi could pull the shirt over his head. He closed his eyes as the world tilted and his vision dimmed.

Desi put her hands on his shoulders and helped him lie down. She examined the wound and pulled out her wand, getting ready to seal it when someone knocked on the door.

"Don't use magic on that wound!" Alice Longbottom said as she stuck her head inside. She hurried over and lowered Desi's wand. "If you attempt to heal him with magic, the wound will fester and fever will set in. It's an anti-counter measure of the spell the Death Eaters used."

"Well what am I to do, then?" Desi asked, concerned.

"Yeah, what is she to do, then?" Sirius asked weakly.

"You'll have to stitch it," Alice said. "He'll have to heal like a Muggle."

"What about all the people who are hurt worse?"

"They've been sent to St. Mungo's. The doctors were made aware of the situation and are doing everything in their power to save them. They are confident that they will be able to find a solution that won't activate the anti-counter measure."

Desi nodded and dug in the medic bag for a suture kit. "I don't suppose we have any anesthetic lying around, eh?"

"Do we?" Sirius asked. Alice shook her head apologetically and left them alone. "No, Des..._do we_?! If not, I veto this completely."

"Relax, love," Desi said, threading a needle. "Think of something happy. The first stick is the worst."

"Something happy? Desi, at this moment, that's a little harder than it sounds."

"Is it?" she asked as she cleaned the wound. "So, the fact that you're alive, the fact that James and Lily can return home to Harry, the fact that Alice and Frank can go back to Araya and little Neville...those things don't make you happy?"

"Well, Desdemona, I am, at present, laying on a cold desk with a hole in my side caused by an unknown spell with anti-counter measures. Add to that four hours of smoke inhalation and fighting rabid Death Eaters," Sirius said. "I lost at least two close friends, with loads more injured. So, at present, the bad is somewhat overshadowing the good."

Desi listened to his raspy rant as she sanitized the needle. She approached him and placed one hand beside his wound, applying pressure. Sirius grunted in pain and breathed shallowly.

"Ok, well since everything is so horrible at the moment, I won't try to make you think of something happy to take your mind off the pain."

"Good, because right now it wouldn't work."

"Looks like we'll have to go with surprise instead. So, Sirius," she said, readying the needle for the first suture, "the most surprising thing I know of to tell you is that I'm pregnant."

Sirius's eyes widened and he lifted his head. "What?!"

Desi inserted the needle into his skin and began sewing his wound closed. "I was going to tell you tonight over dinner, but since that wasn't an option..."

Sirius lay back down and closed his eyes, clenching his jaw against pain and nausea. "This...this is for real? You're not...just trying to distract me?"

"If I was, is it working?"

"Dammit, Desi, this is not something to joke about. Are you being real?"

She tied off the sutures with a small knot. "Yes, Sirius. I am being real. You're going to be a father. In about six months, actually." Desi watched him evenly, the only sign of her nervousness being the unconscious nibbling of her lower lip.

Sirius pushed himself into a sitting position, wincing as his stitches pulled, but keeping his eyes steadily on hers. "Six months," he repeated breathlessly. "We...we're having a baby in six months?"

"Well, _I'm_ having a baby in six months," she corrected with a smile, "but you can come if you want."

He sat perfectly still for a long moment and Desi thought she would go mad with waiting. "Would you please say something?" she asked.

"I'm...it's...processing," Sirius said. He stared blankly, his unfocused gaze somewhere on Desi's chin. "A baby? You and I..."

"Yes, love, a baby. Are you alright?" she asked, catching his shoulders as he slumped forward. "Sirius, lie down."

He closed his eyes and allowed her to usher him back on the desk. "Sorry, Des. I'm sorry. Must be the blood loss. I'm a bit dizzy."

"It's ok," Desi said, lightly rubbing his chest. "I'm such an idiot. I shouldn't have just sprung this on you. Especially after all you've been through tonight."

Sirius chuckled and covered her hands with his, opening his eyes and looking at her. "Des, love, it's alright. I'm glad you told me tonight."

"You are?" she asked quietly, her face splitting in a smile.

"Don't be thick," he said. He pushed himself back up, ignoring her protests. "We're having a baby!" he exclaimed, grinning at her. "I'm chuffed as nuts, sweetheart," he assured her, hauling her to him and pulling her face down to his. He kissed her, long and deep. "Thank you for telling me," he whispered against her lips. "Especially tonight."

Desi blinked against a sudden rush of tears. Darn pregnancy hormones. "I love you, Sirius," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I love you too, Diz," he said, sliding his hands around her hips and drawing her even closer. He ducked his head, kissing her throat before sliding his head down further and placing a kiss over her sternum. Desi giggled and leaned back slightly. Sirius dragged one hand from its place on her rump and placed it lightly on her lower stomach. "I love you too, little one."

"You're such a cream puff," Desi sniffed with a laugh, wiping her eyes. He kissed her again and she cupped his cheeks. They separated as a knock sounded on the door and reality crashed back in.

"There you are!" Lily exclaimed, rushing inside. She gathered Sirius up in a hug, squeezing his neck tightly. "Oh my God, I've been so worried about you," she said, releasing him and turning her embrace on Desi. "I didn't see you come back and then I saw Alice and she said Sirius had been wounded and I didn't see you in any of the other rooms so I didn't know if he had been taken to St. Mungo's-"

"Lily, sweetheart, breathe," James said, gripping her shoulders. "Y'alright, mate?" he asked Sirius, his eyes uncharacteristically solemn.

Sirius nodded, slowly down a t-shirt that James had passed to him. "Only a scratch. Nothing to worry about."

"You look pale," Lily said, touching his face.

"He lost a lot of blood," Desi said.

"And what was left drained away as soon as she spilled that she was knocked up," Sirius said, slipping from the desk and leaning on Desi for support.

"Bless your heart! You should be at home not—did you say knocked up?" Lily asked, interrupting herself. She looked at Desi, mouth agape, and back at Sirius, who smiled like a goofball. "You're going to have a baby?" she squeaked. "You're going to have a baby!" she repeated excitedly when Desi nodded, squeezing her friend to her chest and squealing happily.

"I don't think they heard you in China, Lil," James said, laughing. He slapped Sirius on the back, wincing in sympathy as he jostled his friend's wounded side. "Sorry, mate."

"S'ok," Sirius said. "Have you seen Arthur?" he asked.

The mood settled and everyone turned quiet. James cleared his throat. "He went home for Molly. He wanted to talk to her in person so he could be there in case it was too much for her. Because of just having the baby."

"Dumbledore called for a meeting of the Order," Lily said. "He wants us here tomorrow as early as possible."

"Go home you two," James said. "Get some rest."

"You too," Desi said, wrapping her arm around Sirius's back. "Where's my darling godson tonight?" she asked Lily.

"Arabella has him," she replied. The foyer had quieted as wounded wizards and witches were patched up and sent home. Only a few people remained, cleaning up the blood and spent medical supplies. "When Baby Black is born, Arabella is definitely my recommended babysitter."

Sirius wrapped his arms around Desi's hips and held her close. "Take me home, Mrs. Black," he whispered.

"I don't think we should Disapparate," Desi said. "What about your side?"

Sirius cursed and Desi stepped away, slipping her fingers through his. "Come on," she said. "We'll catch the bus."

"Want company?" Lily asked, but Desi shook her head.

"No, we'll be fine," she said. "Go on back and get Harry. We'll see you in the morning."

–

* * *

The first edges of dawn were already creeping upon the horizon by the time Desi and Sirius made it to bed. They had taken a shower and she had insisted on disinfecting his wound one more time before bandaging it.

A few hours later, Desi awoke to the sound of an owl tapping at her window. She glanced at her sleeping husband and crept from the bed, careful not to wake him. She slipped a long t-shirt over her head and removed the envelope from the owl's beak, giving him a treat, and then left the bedroom and went downstairs. She put some tea on before opening the letter addressed to her, written in Dumbledore's familiar scrawl.

_One o'clock_

_Florean Fortescue's_

_Diagon Alley_

Desi checked her watch and sighed. She would let Sirius sleep a little while longer before they headed across town. When she had waited as long as she could, she went back upstairs and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Sirius," she said quietly, lightly shaking his shoulder. He frowned in his sleep, but did not wake. She said his name again, somewhat louder, but he slept on. Desi smiled to herself, shaking her head. She leaned forward until her lips hovered above his. "Sirius," she whispered. "Wake u—aggghh!"

Her breathy summons ended in a squeal as Sirius wrapped his arms around her and rolled, pinning her beneath him in a movement so fast that she never saw it coming.

"Ow, ow! Bloody hell!" Sirius said, having forgotten about his wounded side. He uttered a few other choice expletives and rolled off Desi, laughing lightly. "Merlin's beard," he hissed, his hand automatically going to the bandage that covered his stitches. "See what you made me do?" he asked sleepily, grinning at her.

Desi thumped his chest. "_You_ nearly gave me a heart attack," she chuckled.

"Oh, think of the baby!" he exclaimed dramatically, rolling onto his knees and toppling Desi backward on the bed. She shrieked with ticklish laughter as he deftly scooped up her t-shirt and stuck his head beneath the hem. "Y'alright in there?" he asked, pressing his face against her belly and placing two smacking kisses against the skin.

"Get out from there, you moron," Desi laughed, lightly shoving at his shoulders.

Sirius settled back down, keeping her shirt pushed up and resting his cheek on her stomach. The palm of his hand rubbed small circles against her flesh and he smiled. "Think he can hear me yet?"

"What makes you think it's a he?" Desi asked, arching a brow.

"It's only fair that it be a boy," he replied, tilting his face up to look at her. "Otherwise I'd be outnumbered."

"If it's a boy, _I'll _be outnumbered," she countered with a grin. "Where's the fairness in that?"

Sirius scoffed. "You'd still be in charge," he said. "But at least I'd have a comrade around here who could back me up when you went to bossing me around," he teased.

"That's it. I'm making this baby come out a girl, just for spite," Desi said as she threaded her fingers in his hair and gave a flirty tug.

He grinned and kissed her navel. "You probably would too, stubborn Irish witch." He draped his arm across her waist and held her tightly.

She wrapped a leg around his arm and stroked his hair, sighing. She was content to lie in her husband's arms forever, but she knew that wasn't an option. "Dumbledore sent an owl earlier. He wants us to meet him at Fortescue's at one o'clock."

Sirius muttered a curse and sighed. "I guess that means I have to move," he said.

"'Fraid so," Desi said, patting his head.

Sirius playfully rubbed his goatee on her belly before sitting up. Desi rolled out from beneath him and went up to her knees, leaning over the edge of the bed and looking in the drawer of her nightstand. Unable to resist the temptation, Sirius swiftly hooked a finger in the band of her blue panties and snapped the elastic against her butt.

Desi squeaked and threw a glare over her shoulder. "You are such a juvenile," she said, shaking her head with a reluctant grin.

"You know you love it," Sirius said, smiling. "Come on, come on. We've got to go meet Dumbledore," he said, waving her toward the bathroom. "Shower, clothes, et cetera. Get a move on."

"I just have to wash my hair," Desi said, whapping him in the face with a pillow as she passed.

They were a little late meeting Dumbledore, but as they made their apologies, he smiled at them over his half-moon spectacles and licked his ice cream cone.

"It's alright," he said. "I understand that you've taken Sirius off travel by magic for the time being."

Desi looked sheepish. "I mean, he can if he wants to," she said with a shrug. "I just didn't know if he should."

"I understand completely," Dumbledore assured her. "Many times in the Wizarding world, people forget that we are still human because of our reliance on magic. These things must be taken into account when healing by Muggle standards."

"Dumbledore, where is everyone?" Sirius asked, getting to task.

Dumbledore sighed. "After much consideration, I have decided to meet with certain members of the Order alone, away from prying eyes and ears."

"So there is a spy?" Sirius asked, clenching his fist. "I knew it," he whispered savagely.

Desi laid her hand over his fist, rubbing the back of his knuckles with her thumb. "Are there any clues as to who it might be?"

"I have my suspicions, but, for now, that is all they are. I felt it would be more prudent for security to meet in small groups for the next little while. Now, on to business," he said, linking his fingers and stacking his hands on the table. "But first, I hear congratulations are in order," he said, smiling at Desi.

She smiled back, her hand automatically going to her stomach. "Thank you, sir," she said.

Dumbledore chuckled. "You may want to save your thanks, Desdemona," he said. "I have decided, in light of your current condition, to take your name from the active roll."

"But sir—"

"It is a temporary verdict, I assure you," Dumbledore interrupted. "It is a decision I make with all expectant mothers. You will return to active duty, should you wish, as soon as the baby is born."

She cast a glance at Sirius and her eyes narrowed as he nodded along with Dumbledore's edict. Crossing her arms over her chest, she slouched against the table.

"Also," Dumbledore began, and Desi sighed, knowing whatever followed was just going to add to her crappy mood. "The Muggle school in Hempstead has received your letter of resignation as well."

"Teachers teach all the time when they're pregnant!" she protested.

"Alas, this decision has nothing to do with your condition," he replied. "Due to recent security threats and the Order's high level of alert, we must focus on keeping our ranks tightly sealed. You are not being punished, Mrs. Black," he added. "The closer everyone is to our people, the better things will be."

"Sticking you way off by yourself in a Muggle village during the day is dangerous," Sirius said.

Desi sighed again. "Alright, fine," she said reluctantly. "I temporarily remove myself from active duty."

"Actually, Dumbledore removed you from active duty," Sirius corrected, winking when she glared at him. He looked at the wizened wizard across from him and took Desi's hand. "Des, would you give us a minute?"

"Is this about your conversation last night?" she asked. When he remained silent, she slipped from her chair and stood. "Very well. While you have your man-to-man talk, I'm going to spend your money on baby things," she said. She nodded to Dumbledore. "Sir."

"Mrs. Black," Dumbledore said with a smile and nod. "Sirius, I do believe that given your and your wife's personalities, Hogwarts had better batten down the hatches when your child starts to school," he said, chuckling as he watched Desi disappear into the crowd.

Sirius smiled, considering Dumbledore's words a compliment to his unborn offspring.


	11. Chapter 11

_October 24, 1981_

Desi doodled a picture of a little bow on the corner of her parchment. Since she had been put on in-house duties—which really stirred Women's Lib among the witches in the office—she had taken notes, charted maps, and logged information for recon teams.

She was one paperclip away from going mad.

She leaned back in her office desk and touched the tip of her quill with her finger, testing the sharpness of the point. Squinting her eyes and taking aim, she launched the quill at one of the foam ceiling tiles, smiling to herself when it stuck.

"Bored, love?"

Desi spun in her chair and sighed as Lily approached. "That's an understatement," she said. "I feel so out of the loop. I don't like this at all."

"You might as well settle in, dearest," Lily said sympathetically. "Dumbledore waited a little longer to bench me, but if you care to recall, I did my time in that chair."

"Where are the boys?" Desi asked suddenly, frowning at the comings and goings and noting three glaring absences.

"Remus and James went with Alastor and Dumbledore to meet someone. I suppose Sirius tagged along."

"Where were they going?" She suddenly felt anxious. Something wasn't right.

"The safe room in old Lipton's cabin," Lily said. "Des, what's wrong?"

"I don't know," Desi said, frowning. "But...something."

"Come on," Lily said as she gripped Desi's wrist.

"Where are we going? I'm not supposed to leave," she said as Lily dragged her to the fireplace.

"We're going to the cabin," Lily said. "I know you, and I know your hinky forewarning feelings...if you think something is wrong, then something is wrong." She pulled Desi into the fireplace, shouted the address, and threw down some Floo Powder. They disappeared in a tunnel of green flame.

When they reappeared, it was in a low hearth in a dank cabin. By the time the women stopped spinning, James, Remus, and Sirius were standing in front of the hearth with wands at the ready.

"What in the bloody hell do you think you are doing here?" Sirius roared, hauling them from the fireplace. He gave Lily a shake and passed her to James, then turned his attention to Desi. "We could have killed you!"

"Don't be so dramatic," Desi said hotly. "It isn't as if Death Eaters often use the Floo Network."

"What are you two doing here?" Remus asked, gently drawing Desi's attention before she and Sirius got into a full-blown fight.

"Desi feels something...wrong," Lily said.

"So you show up unannounced?" James asked. "Dammit all, Lil, you don't know what you could have been walking in to."

"What are we walking in to?" Desi asked.

"A meeting, Desdemona."

The group turned at the sound of Dumbledore's voice. Beside him stood a man that Desi hadn't seen since Hogwarts—Severus Snape. Though they had been on the brink of a fight a moment before, Desi found herself stepping closer to Sirius as a sign of solidarity. She noted the way he had gone deadly still, frozen in place with hatred burning in his icy blue eyes.

"What are you doing here?" James asked, his voice eerily calm.

"My business is with Dumbledore, Potter, not you and your ever-faithful lackies," Snape said, raking the group with a sneer.

"Are you offering your services against Voldemort?" Lily asked. Snape whipped his head around and stared at her.

"My business is with Dumbledore," he repeated.

"Well our business is Dumbledore's business," James said, stepping forward.

"James," Remus warned.

"You might have weaseled your way into Hogwarts," Sirius said, advancing as well, "but I'll be damned if you lead your Death Eater friends to the Resistance."

Snape turned to face them fully with a flurry of robes, reaching for his wand. The sudden movement was the only bait James and Sirius needed. They rushed forward and grappled with Snape. Lily and Desi burst into action, pulling at their spouses as they tied in the fray.

"Stop, both of you!" Desi shouted, pummeling Sirius and James on the back.

"Severus, please!" Lily cried, trying to squeeze between her husband and her former friend.

"James, Sirius, that's enough!" Remus called, looking around the tumble of bodies toward where Dumbledore was standing.

"ENOUGH!"

Everyone froze.

In all the years they had known him, no one had ever heard Dumbledore raise his voice in anger. Fury roiled like a living beast as he glared at his most trusted wizards.

"Out," he said quietly. "James, Sirius, Remus...assist Alastor outside. Desdemona and Lily, please, go home."

"You can't possibly be considering-"

Dumbledore interrupted Sirius without a word. He simply raised his hand and the younger man fell silent. Respect, he had learned, worked far better than arguing.

Remus shuffled James and Sirius outside while Lily and Desi returned to the hearth. The last thing Desi saw before they disappeared from the cottage was Snape and Dumbledore in an intense conversation. She saw the shock in Dumbledore's eyes as he looked toward the fireplace, but then they were gone, back to the offices used by the Resistance.

–

* * *

The dimly lit pub was loud and crowded. Desi looked to where James and Sirius sat huddled in a corner, talking intently. Lily sat across from her with her face buried in her hands. Harry sat in a highchair next to the mahogany table, babbling happily as he gnawed on a licorice wand.

"I don't understand," Lily whispered, her voice so quiet Desi barely heard her. "Why us? Why is he coming after us, specifically?"

"I don't know, honey," Desi said, reaching over and laying a hand on Lily's head. "What did Dumbledore say when he called you in?"

"I'm not supposed to discuss it," Lily said miserably. She looked up at Desi with tears in her eyes. "I have to pack up everything, hide from everyone, and I can't even tell you why! I want this sonofabitch to fall, Desi. And soon," she added, looking at her son. "I don't want Harry to grow up like us."

"Hey, now. We did alright, didn't we?" Desi asked lightly. Lily didn't smile, so she gave up the cheery pretense. "I don't want to raise my child with Voldemort on the loose either. We'll find him, Lil. We'll take him down, and then we'll live our lives the way they should be lived. Harry and Little Baby can play together in the park. We'll take them to Ireland to see my folks and you can meet my brother," she said, smiling sadly. "You and James and me and Sirius, we'll get old and grey and hassle all the youngsters who listen to rock'n'roll music."

Lily chuckled, sniffing, before turning sad again. "What'll happen to you if I'm not around to keep you from trouble?"

"I'll just have to keep myself out of it for a bit, until you get back," Desi said. "And maybe without his partner in crime, Sirius can keep his nose clean too," she added. She saw the men rise and start to cross the pub.

"Lil, sweetheart, it's time to go," James said. His voice sounded thicker, harsher than it usually did.

Lily stood and bent to pick up Harry. Desi followed her, sliding from the booth, and wrapped her arms around James. Over the past couple of years, he had changed completely from the arrogant, insufferable prat who had been at school and Desi had come to love him. It was hard for her to say goodbye, even temporarily.

She released James and turned to Lily, who passed Harry to Sirius. Both women tried to hold off tears, but had barely embraced before the torrents came.

"I love you, Des," Lily whispered on a broken sob.

"I love you too," Desi replied. "So much. I don't know what I'd've done if I hadn't found you."

"Gotten expelled, probably," Sirius said, bouncing Harry.

Lily laughed through her tears, but still didn't release Desi. After a moment, James placed a hand on her shoulder.

"We have to leave, love," he said quietly.

Sirius gave the baby to Desi as she wiped her eyes on the end of her sleeve. The child chattered as she watched Sirius embrace James. Her husband squeezed his eyes shut and breathed deeply, holding his emotions in check. He slapped his best friend and brother on the back and cleared his throat.

"I'll be seeing you," he said, bending and placing a chaste kiss on Lily's lips. He lifted her in a bear hug, holding her feet a few inches off the floor. "Take care of my boy," he said.

"Which one?" Lily asked, burying her face against his neck.

"I reckon the old one can take care of himself," Sirius said, setting her back on her feet. "You just take care of my godson. And don't go trying to ruin him," he added, wagging his finger in her face. "As soon as this is done, I'm gonna teach him everything I know. I can't do that if he's all ruined with good manners."

"I love you," Lily said, giving him another quick squeeze. Desi passed Harry to her and she stepped away from them. "Take care of each other," she said as James wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She stifled a sob and buried her face in his coat as he turned and led her from the boisterous pub.

"Sirius."

Sirius watched his best friends leave and wrapped his arms around his wife, huddling her in his arms as she clung to him and cried.

–

* * *

Desi opened her eyes in the middle of the night. She turned her head and looked at Sirius, but he was sleeping peacefully so she didn't want to wake him. Sliding from her bed, she pulled on a t-shirt as she left the bedroom and went downstairs to get something to drink. She reached for the scotch before she remembered the baby. With a sigh, she put it back in the cabinet and got a glass of water. She was returning to the staircase when something down the hallway caught her attention. A bright, pulsing green glow was coming from the direction of the den.

Curious, Desi padded down the hall. Her breath caught when she turned the corner. Her living room—no, not _her_ living room. _Lily's_ living room, she realized, seeing the photos on the floor—was turned upside down. Broken furniture littered the area. Desi struggled to breathe, wanting nothing more than to run from the room, but unable to do so. Something drew her onward. She cried out as she stepped on something sharp with her bare foot.

She closed her eyes as fear gripped her heart. Slowly turning her head to the right, she opened her eyes. Bile rose in her throat as she caught a glimpse of the dark figure slumped against the wall. She looked down, lifting her bleeding foot and choking back a sob when she saw the broken spectacles.

"James?" she whispered, approaching the body. Summoning her strength, she bent and touched the man's cold cheek, unable to stop the trembling in her hands. The head flopped to the side, the eyes—James's eyes—were open and unseeing in death.

Desi scrambled back, falling on her butt. Debris pierced her palms, but her eyes stayed riveted on the dead body of James Potter. She knew she was dreaming...she had to be. She had dreamed this dream before, but not with such realism. She pushed herself to her feet and began looking around for Lily, ignoring the pain in her feet as she trampled on broken glass and splintered wood.

"Lily!" she cried. "Lily, where are you?"

She heard a sound coming from behind her and turned, slightly disoriented at finding herself at the end of the hallway in the Potters' house. She ran toward the sound, a high, keening laugh.

She knew that sound.

"Lily!" she shouted, bursting into the nursery. Voldemort stood there, his wand drawn and pointed at her best friend. Desi attacked him, but his form slid through her hands like smoke.

"Not Harry," Lily pleaded, shaking her head. "Please! Not Harry."

"Stand aside, you silly girl," Voldemort said with a chuckle. "Stand aside now."

"Not Harry," Lily repeated, louder. "Please. No, take me! Kill me instead!"

Voldemort laughed again as if this was all just one big folly. Desi couldn't move. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't pull herself from this nightmare. She was powerless to do anything but stand and watch the downfall of her family.

"Have mercy!" Lily shouted. "Please, I'll do anything!"

"_Avada kedavra_!" Voldemort shouted, and the room became washed in bright green light.

"NO!" Desi screamed, bolting upright in bed. Around the room, the glass from picture frames exploded as she sent out a pulse of uncontrolled magic. Sirius was beside her in an instant, his arms wrapped tightly around her as she sobbed and heaved against his chest.

"Desi?! What is it, love? Des, you're scaring me," Sirius said as he stroked her back. "Sshh. It's alright. You're alright. Shh..."

It was a long while before she could speak. When she finally found her voice, it sounded strange to her ears, deeper and coarser than normal. She told him about her dream, holding her face in her trembling hands as she struggled for control.

"We lose," she breathed. "All of it is for nothing, Sirius. We lose."

"Hush now, love," he said, taking her into his arms. "It was only a dream."

"It wasn't just a dream," she said. "I think it was a vision. I've had it before, sort of. This was only part of the usual nightmare, but I've had it before. I've seen how we die."

"You never put stock into future-casting," Sirius reminded her. "You've always been firm in the idea that we make our own futures."

"Maybe we can stop it," she said. "I don't know. I don't know why I keep having that dream, but it is getting stronger. And it was more centralized on James and Lily this time."

Sirius was quiet for a long moment. Finally, he kissed her head. "Come on," he said, getting up. "I'm taking you to Dumbledore," he explained when she looked at him questioningly. "He'll know what to do."

They sent an owl to Dumbledore and went to the Resistance headquarters to wait on him. When he arrived, Sirius recounted Desi's dream to the older wizard.

"Sir, James and Lily are in hiding, but I'm not certain that that is enough protection for them."

Dumbledore looked troubled, which made Desi even more unsettled. "I agree, Desdemona. I agree. We must take every precaution to ensure that your vision does not transpire."

"Perhaps a Fidelis Charm?" Sirius suggested.

"That is a good idea, Sirius," Dumbledore said, looking thoughtful. "A Fidelis Charm will lock the Potters' location away so that no one, not even they themselves, can divulge the information. We should go to their flat tonight."

A sharp pain streaked through Desi's stomach, making her catch her breath. She pressed her hand against her abdomen.

"Desi, are you alright?" Sirius asked, looking at his wife. She nodded, but he looked doubtful.

"I'm fine," she insisted. "I think the baby's just upset," she added.

"You need to rest," Sirius said.

"I have to go with you," she countered, looking at Dumbledore for support. "I can help."

"Sirius is right, Desdemona," Dumbledore said with a shake of his head. "You should get some rest. Your child will thank you for it."

Desi's eyes filled with tears, but she raised her chin stubbornly.

"I'll take care of them, love," Sirius promised quietly. "Go on home."

Angry and hurting, Desi Disapparated back to her bedroom, leaving Sirius and Dumbledore to go to the Potters' house and see to their move.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: You probably guessed by the date, but this is where it ALL goes south. **

_October 31, 1981_

The news reached the Black house by owl.

There had been an attack at Godric's Hollow. Desi was at the office, working on a tracking list, so Sirius received the letter alone. He went immediately to Godric's Hollow on his motorbike. He collapsed to his knees as his eyes landed on the burned out wreckage that had been the Potters' house. His eyes filled with tears and he scrambled to his feet again and began digging in the rubble, ignoring the pain as his fingers blistered amidst the smoldering ruins.

"Sirius?"

He whipped around, his eyes wild, as someone called his name. He relaxed as he saw his friend, Hagrid.

"What're you doing here, Hagrid?" he croaked.

Hagrid, who had a sensitive soul and a kind heart, sniffed back his tears and comforted Sirius, who was pale and shaking. "Dumbledore sent me for little Harry," Hagrid said.

"Harry?" Sirius breathed. "He's alive?"

"He is," Hagrid said, pushing his coat aside and showing Sirius the sleeping baby secured in a sling around Hagrid's midsection.

"Give him to me," Sirius said quietly, eyes fixed on the baby. "I'm his godfather, Hagrid. He should be with me."

"I've got orders to take the lad to Dumbledore," Hagrid said, closing his coat. "If yer wantin' the boy, you should come and talk to him. If you don't mind, could you give us a lift?"

"Take the motorbike," Sirius said blankly, straightening. "Keep it. I won't need it. Take Harry to Dumbledore. Straight away."

"You'll not be coming then?"

"No," Sirius said, his voice still distant. "No, there's something I have to do."

Without another word, he left his godson in the care of the half-giant and Disapparated back to his house. He knew with cold certainty who had betrayed them.

Peter Pettigrew.

The little rat had been keeping busy on missions for the Order, but had obviously been serving another master. He'd find the bastard and he'd kill him.

For James and Lily.

For Little Harry.

Sirius threw some items in a bag and tore off a piece of parchment so that he could write Desi a note. He didn't know how long he would be gone. As long as it took to track down Pettigrew.

"Sirius!" Desi's frantic cry came from downstairs. He heard her footfalls on the staircase. "Sirius! They're gone! James and Lily are gone!" She burst into the bedroom and rushed into his arms. "Voldemort found them. They're dead!"

"I know," Sirius said evenly.

His calm demeanor made Desi quiet down and look at him. Her eyes met his and she shook her head.

"Oh, Sirius," she whispered. "What are you planning? Please...please don't do anything. Let's just go. Let's just pack up and leave London," she pleaded. "Please don't go after him."

Sirius pulled away from her and slung the bag over his chest. He tucked his wand in his back pocket, as was his custom, and looked at her. "I will leave, but I'll not run from him," he said savagely. "First I'm going to kill his spy. Then I'll kill Voldemort. But I'm leaving now, Desi. Step aside."

"You know who the spy is?" Desi asked. She clenched his jacket in her hands and gave him a shake. "Sirius?" she asked when he didn't answer. He brushed past her and left the bedroom. As she stared after him, one solitary tear slid down her cheek. She started after him, calling his name as she hit the stairs. "You can't just lea-"

Her sentence was lost as their front door splintered. Three Death Eaters streaked inside, moving so fast they appeared as smoke. Sirius called for her to get down, bounding over the banister and blocking her from their attackers. He pulled her down and crouched in front of her, countering the Death Eaters' spells and attacking with his own. He heard Desi's voice in his ear and caught a glance of her in his peripheral vision, noting that she was over his shoulder, firing her own defenses.

"_Avada kedavra_!" she shouted, landing a blow on the tall Death Eater closest to them.

The wall behind them exploded and debris rained down upon them as the remaining two Death Eaters shot spells at them.

"Upstairs Desdemona," Sirius shouted. "Now!"

Desi turned and scrambled upstairs. She shoved an old wooden wardrobe over onto its side and called for Sirius. He joined her in the doorway of the bedroom, hunched behind their makeshift barrier. They fought for what seemed like hours, but finally the last Death Eater fell. Desi wiped sweat from her forehead with a shaking hand, keeping a tight grip on her wand.

"You're alright?" Sirius asked as he stood.

"I'm alright," she affirmed with a nod, stepping over the overturned armoire and approaching the Death Eater's body. "This one is still alive," she said without emotion.

Sirius rushed over and pulled away the mask, surprised at the fine-boned, feminine face it revealed. The woman might have been lovely once upon a time, but with blood coming from her mouth and hatred burning in her eyes, she looked every bit an evil spirit.

"Where's Pettigrew?" Sirius asked, his voice deadly.

"I won't tell you anything, blood-traitor," the woman wheezed. She spat blood at him.

"Crucio!" Sirius said, pointing his wand at her. The woman flailed and screamed. Finally he relented and she was still, panting and groaning in pain. "I'll ask again. Where is Pettigrew?"

"The Dark Lord kills those who betray him," the woman said as tears streamed down her face.

"You're already dead," he said. "Tell me what I want and I will end your suffering. Keep jerking me around and I will drag it out as long as possible."

Desi watched her husband, afraid. He was colder than she had ever seen him and she was scared that he was close to losing his true self. They had never resorted to torture for information. Aurors were authorized to use the Killing Curse on Death Eaters, so they occasionally did as well, but this... She grimaced as he used the Cruciatus Curse again.

"Diagon Alley!" the woman shouted amid her screams. "He's in Diagon Alley!"

Sirius released the curse. "Where in Diagon Alley?"

"He's staying above the Leaky Cauldron," the woman said, coughing up blood. She looked at Sirius, her eyes pleading. "Finish it."

Instead of ending her anguish, Sirius turned away, looking at Desi. "Go to Dumbledore," he instructed. "He's got Harry. I'll contact you when I can."

"You're going after him? Alone?" Desi asked, glancing at the dying woman. The Death Eater coughed again, and then was still.

"Pettigrew was Secret Keeper," Sirius said. "I convinced James to pick him since everyone would assume it was me. It is my fault, Desi. Do not think to stop me," he said harshly, drawing her attention. "I will not be swayed in this."

"If you are so set on going on this suicide mission, then I'm going with you," Desi said hotly.

"You're not," he said. "This is something I'm doing alone."

"Like hell!"

"Do not push me, woman!" Sirius shouted, punching the wall. "You get to Dumbledore," he said after a moment as he struggled for calm. "Get Harry. Keep him and our child safe. I will come back for you when it is done."

Desi angled her chin defiantly, trying in vain to keep from crying. When she spoke, her voice was steady and strong.

"If you think for one minute I am going to let you go without me, you've got another thing coming," she said quietly. "I'm coming with you, and good luck trying to stop me."

"Desi..."

"No." She shook her head and brought her hands to his cheeks. "You are my family, Sirius Black. You're all I have in this world." She kissed him gently, pulling away and smoothing back the boyish lock of hair that always fell across his forehead.

"We need to go if we're going," she said.

Sirius nodded, not inclined to argue the matter further. He supposed he should, given the danger of the situation and the risk involved to both his wife and unborn child, but he knew the look in Desi's eyes and knew that regardless of what he said, her mind was made up.

* * *

_Early morning, November 1, 1981_

They tracked the rat down. He spotted them outside the Leaky Cauldron and bolted down the street, shoving Muggles and drawing attention to himself. Sirius and Desi chased him over several blocks of London. Desi fell behind but Sirius kept on going and finally cornered him in an alley.

"Give it up, Peter," Sirius spat. "It's over."

"It isn't over," Pettigrew said. "The Dark Lord—"

"Voldemort is dead!" Sirius shouted. "You killed James and Lily for nothing!"

"I didn't!" Pettigrew insisted.

"You were his spy! You told him where to find them!"

"He was going to kill me, Sirius!" Pettigrew whined.

"Well he's dead," Sirius said again. "So it looks like that honour falls to me."

Pettigrew grinned, looking over Sirius's shoulder. Sirius glanced back and saw Desi rounding the corner.

"_Expelliarmus_!" Sirius shouted at Pettigrew, even as the other wizard fired a spell of his own.

Sirius watched helplessly as purple flames shot from Pettigrew's wand a split second before his spell knocked the wand from his hand. The flames went off course, but a couple of small ones hit Desi in the center of her chest. She stopped running and looked at Sirius curiously before slumping to her knees in the alley.

"Desi!" Sirius shouted. He pointed his wand at Pettigrew, who had taken advantage of his inattention and retrieved his wand. "_Stupify_!"

"_Expulso_!" Pettigrew yelled at the same time, pointing his wand at the side of the apartment building that shadowed them.

The building exploded as if someone had packed every crack and cranny with C-4. The force of the explosion knocked Sirius to the ground, even as the alley crumbled beneath him. He rolled down the side of the crater, his head slamming into a piece of asphalt as debris rained down on him. He looked to his left and saw Desi's still form lying on her back. Summoning his strength and moving past the pain, he crawled over to her with tears leaving trails in the dirt on his face.

"Des? Desi, love, wake up," he cried, gathering her in his arms.

"Sirius?" Desi whispered. "I'm sorry."

"Shh," he said, trying for a smile. "You'll be fine, love. You and the baby."

"I was stupid," she said, her voice weakening. "Shouldn't have come. Protected the baby."

"It'll be ok, Desi. I promise," he said. His blue eyes shined amid the dirt and mud on his face, his tears building and dripping unchecked.

"Don't cry," Desi breathed. "I love you."

"I love you too," Sirius said. His breath caught as Desi's head went slack, falling back against his arm. "Desi," he said, shaking her gently. "Desi, no. Desdemona, don't you do this!" he shouted on a sob. "Come back to me, Des," he pleaded. He cradled her in his arms and buried his face against her neck, rocking her as he cried.

Sirens wailed in the distance. Sirius gently lay Desi down and folded her hands over her chest. He placed a kiss on her lips and stood, looking around the rubble for any sign of Pettigrew. He spied a fat rat skirting the wall of the crater.

"_Avada kedavra_!" he cried. The rat bolted into a sewer pipe, narrowly escaping the killing curse.

Sirius ran over to the pipe, but the vermin was out of sight. Sirius fell to his knees and hung his head. He spotted something out of the corner of his eye. A short, bloody finger lay on the ground next to the sewer pipe. He picked up the discarded digit, examining it as he scrambled to his feet. He could not contain the bubble of hysteria that built in his chest. He giggled quietly at first, but it built and built until he was doubled over with laughter.

When the Ministry of Magic's team of Aurors arrived, tears were streaming down his face and his eyes glowed with a kind of madness. Cornelius Fudge examined Desi's body and discovered that she was alive, though barely so. His team restrained the laughing madman holding the bloody remains of poor Peter Pettigrew. Fudge waved a team of healers down from the edge of the crater and they loaded Desi onto the stretcher.

Sirius saw the men taking Desi away on a stretcher and began clawing at the Aurors who held him.

"Desdemona!" he screamed. Over and over he shouted for her, until his voice was hoarse and his throat raw.

Bartemius Crouch, Sr. arrived on the scene and surveyed the surrounding area.

"What've we got, Cornelius?"

"Sirius Black," Fudge said, shaking his head as Sirius struggled fruitlessly against his magical bonds. "According to witnesses, Sirius was chasing Pettigrew for quite a while. We backtracked them to the Leaky Cauldron. The barmaid there said Pettigrew mentioned Black being after him. Looks like he caught up with the poor boy," he said. "The owner of that shop says that Pettigrew and Black came into the alley and a moment later the woman entered behind Black. I'm not certain, but I think it was his wife. He must have felt trapped and decided to use an expulsion spell on the Muggle building. Twelve Muggles were inside, Barty. This is bad for us. Very bad indeed."

"Is there any proof that it was Black who did this?" Barty asked.

"The witch at the Leaky Cauldron swears that Pettigrew wanted to avenge the death of James Potter," Fudge said. "He mentioned it several times. Everyone knows Black is the only choice Potter would have for Secret Keeper."

"Moody reported as much," Barty said. "So Black works for Voldemort, does he?" He eyed the maniac in the crater below with revulsion. "Cornelius, the Minister's policy with those in league with the Dark Lord is very clear," he said, putting on his hat and jerking his chin toward Sirius. "Take that filth to Azkaban."

* * *

**A/N2: Ok, so this wasn't the original stopping place because I started working on a Part II that goes sort of along with the events of the books, but I got stalled out on HBP. So, instead of having that one "In Progress" or leaving readers hanging with this one, I made it end here. ****If you're interested in the rest of this one and what I have of the second part, let me know and I'll go ahead and put up what I have or PM it or something.**

**Thanks for sticking with Des! **


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